DISCLAIMER: Not true. Entertainment.
NOTES: For the second dpop desert island five challenge, the song is Elliott Smith's Alameda. Thanks to Sandy the Younger and Tiffany.

CONSTANT STATE OF SUSPENSE

It's on. It's so on tonight, Joey can tell. JC is bursting with something a little bit more than the usual post-show fervor, and he pinches Chris's ass as they strip out of their costumes. Lance smirks, and Joey doesn't miss that Lance sheds his underwear with his costume and just pulls on his jeans. It's on, it's tonight, so Joey openly stares as Lance pulls his jeans over that fine bare ass.

Justin's last in line as they run to the buses and he rubs his hand across Joey's lower back as they split up and Joey and Lance run to their bus and the rest to the other. Lance practically struts through the bus and stands by the bathroom door. He turns and smirks again. He says, "Do I really need a shower? Hmmm." Joey licks his lips. Lance closes his eyes and rubs his chin. He says, "I think I will shower." He goes into the bathroom and closes the door.

Lance takes a quick shower, comes out smelling like soap, and it's hot. It's on, so even the smell of soap is a turn-on to Joey. Joey waits outside his hotel room after he throws down his bag in the room. He watches Lance walk down the hallway, not even strutting anymore, more prowling. Joey just grins and follows Lance to another room. It's JC's room, Joey thinks, but it doesn't matter. It's a big bed, the lights are low and they're the last to arrive.

There are rules, Joey reminds himself as he steps inside. Rules that matter, because otherwise. Otherwise it would be bad. Only on tour. Only when there are at least three of them. And it's just this. Rules, Joey thinks. It's blowing off steam, it's hot, it's a connection, but it's just this.

Lance is already on the bed, pulling JC into a wet, open-mouthed kiss while he rubs against Chris's ass. Chris and Justin are sucking face, too, and Joey almost grins as he thinks it. Sucking face. Justin is tugging off Chris's jeans. JC is pushing up Justin's t-shirt as he kisses Lance, and yeah. Joey doesn't want to be just standing there watching, as hot as that is, and he throws himself on the bed between Chris and Lance. Joey closes his eyes and opens his arms.

Joey opens his eyes, later, after some really good parts, because he wants to see this. Lance is lying half on top of him, both of Lance's hands clawing at Joey's shoulders, Lance's hard-on grinding into Joey's hip while Chris thrusts into Lance over and over again. Joey loves to watch Lance come, the way his face relaxes and his eyes lose focus. Lance is always so tense. And watching Lance come while Justin is sucking on Joey's dick like it's oxygen is pretty much the hottest thing in the world. Add in JC sucking on Joey's fingers so JC can be next, and it's the hottest thing in the known universe. Joey's falling apart, he's on fire. When it's over, when Joey's so sated he thinks he'll maybe never get hard again, he lies back on the bed and closes his eyes again, to replay it all in his head.

Joey wakes up and looks around. JC is curled up on the floor, using Chris's stomach as a pillow. Lance is on the couch, naked and beautiful and sleeping soundly. Joey turns a little and sees Justin lying next to him, awake and staring at the ceiling. "Justy," Joey whispers. "Whatcha looking at?"

"I -- Joey," Justin sighs. "Two weeks ago, when we were all home, me 'n Lance. We, uh. Just the two of us, at my house. We were stoned, but."

Which is just awful. It's breaking the rules but more, it's Lance. Lance has issues, that's how Joey thinks of it, Lance won't admit things to them or to himself. Things. Things like how much Lance likes guys. Joey swallows and looks at Lance sleeping. "That's not good, man."

Justin says, "Yeah." His voice is softer than a whisper. But Joey still hears him say, "I liked it, though."

The next few days are busy nights so nothing happens. Joey watches Lance for signs of whatever, of something. Lance is the same as ever, sly, funny, and he doesn't moon over Justin or anything, so Joey's a little reassured. One-time slip, nothing that will throw anything off. Nothing in Lance's demeanor that means this thing with Justin will screw up the group dynamic or send Lance into some tailspin of waking up from his lifetime of denial.

Justin is less reassuring. Joey can see Justin watching Lance. Quick glances during the soundcheck, an appraising look during a costume change in the show, and worse, the guilty expression when he catches Joey watching him. Justin isn't reassuring at all. There are rules and these things can fuck up everything.

Two nights in a row when they're in a hotel and the first night, it's on again. Joey feels a little uneasy when Justin openly leers at Lance as the door opens, but then Joey decides he can head this off. Nip this in the bud. No favorites allowed.

Joey strips before getting on the bed, practically jumps on Justin. Justin melts into his arms, wraps his legs around Joey's waist. So, that's good. JC has already prepped Justin and Joey and JC exchange a quick, sly glance as Joey pushes in. Tight, hot, Justin arches his back and pushes against him. Justin has one hand fisted in the bedspread and one hand clutching Chris's hair. Chris rears back a little, his whole body pressed against Justin and Joey while he grinds against Lance. Joey closes his eyes, opens them again in time to see Lance come in Chris's frantic hand and with JC's skilled tongue up Lance's ass. Joey never lasts as long as he wants to when they do this because it's all so much. He pushes hard into Justin before it's all bright lights and a shouted, "Fuck."

Joey slumps over Justin. He hears a low growl that can only be Lance and feels Lance's hand slipping in between Justin and Joey, reaching for Justin's still hard dick. And that won't do, so Joey reaches for Lance's hand, starts sucking on Lance's fingers. He rolls over Chris, pushes Chris onto Justin so it's not that obvious what he's doing. Lance is still out of it a little and he just grins as Joey says, "Fuck me, man, fuck me."

Joey falls asleep on the floor with JC after they've blown each other. He wakes up and hears a muffled moaning and skin against skin. Joey sits up and they're on the bed. Justin and Lance are necking, and Joey can see Justin's other hand, the one not wrapped around Lance's dick, cupping Lance's ass and two of those long fingers are pushing in and out. Joey can't see Lance's face but he can tell when Lance comes, can see the way Lance shudders and collapses on the bed. Joey lies back on the floor and tries to sleep.

He corners Justin the next day. "What are you doing, Justin?"

Justin raises an eyebrow and glares at Joey. "What are you doing, Joey?"

"You want Lance or something? You wanna date him?" Joey turns the word date into a sneer.

"I like fucking him. I like sleeping with guys, Lance is a guy, Lance is a hot guy." Justin can't quite pull it off, can't meet Joey's eyes.

"Yeah," Joey says. "You think this makes sense?" He's still sneering.

Justin looks down. "Whatever, Joey. Just cause you don't have the balls to do it." Joey smacks the wall, starts to say something but Justin walks away, his head down.

Joey thinks the kid is full of shit.

He watches Lance, tapping at his laptop on the bus. It's the millionth time Joey's seen Lance like this, it feels exactly the same as all the other times and Justin's so full of shit. Joey says, "What's up with you and Justin?"

Lance looks out the window and closes his laptop. He finally says, "What do you mean?"

"He told me that you two, back at his house." Joey looks away from Lance's profile, plays with his sock. The heel is fraying, all of Joey's socks are fraying at the heels.

Lance says, "We were stoned. He was horny. He's never, you know, he hadn't ever just done it with one guy." As opposed to Lance. Lance won't complete the sentence, but Joey knows that what Lance should be saying. Lance has slept with a lot of guys, just one on one, and everyone knows even if Lance won't ever say a word about it. To anyone.

Joey says, "As opposed to you." Just to see what happens.

Lance doesn't anything. He opens his laptop again, boots the system back up. After a few minutes of silence, Lance finally says, "It's just Justin." Which isn't any kind of answer at all. Joey doesn't know what else to do.

He tries again, the next time they're all in the hotel room, and Chris is licking Justin's neck while JC is sucking on Justin's dick. Joey kisses Lance, slides his slick fingers inside Lance, fucks Lance sweet and slow like they never do when they do this. Joey's fucked girls like this, times when he should have called it making love. He thinks that in his head, the press of Lance's thighs against Joey's chest, and he thinks, this is almost making love. He has his hand on Lance's dick, drawing everything out and for once Joey lasts as long as he wants to. He doesn't come like he's on fire, it's more like a sweet bath of warmth washing over him. He has his eyes open when Lance comes. For Lance, Joey can see, it's great, it's great and just like all the other hot sex they have on nights like this.

Joey rolls off Lance and looks at Lance for a long minute. He should maybe say something. But there are rules. And JC reaches for Joey and they start kissing, JC's legs wrapping around Joey. When Joey looks over a moment later, Chris is between Lance's legs, Lance loves to be fucked twice and Chris is happy to oblige. To oblige. JC is humping Joey and Joey closes his eyes for the rest of it. He hears Justin saying, "Lance, Lance," later, as the two of them kiss and he keeps his eyes closed.

Four days later, Lance is about to get off the bus and he suddenly turns and says to Joey, "As opposed to me." Joey blinks and says nothing. Lance says quietly, "As opposed to me. I've fucked a lot of guys that weren't you guys." Joey blinks again, reaches out his hand but Lance is already off the bus, walking to the venue, surrounded by bodyguards. Joey almost runs to catch up with him, but Lance is walking next to Justin now, head down, their hands nearly touching.

Two days later, Joey walks down the hall of another hotel and sees that Justin's door is open. Justin is pulling Lance inside the room, already kissing him. Justin breaks off the kiss, locks eyes with Joey for a split second and then slams the door with his foot. JC comes up behind Joey, drapes over Joey's shoulder. JC says, "Well. Always knew someone'd end up pairing off, you know?" JC kisses Joey's neck and then says, "Chris is in my room. Wanna come over?" And that's okay, there's three of them, there are rules. Joey doesn't know what else to do besides follow the rules.

Nobody broke your heart
If you're alone it must be you that wants to be apart. - Elliott Smith

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