NOTES AND DISCLAIMERS: All made up. Completely fictional. Joey quotes Aaron Sorkin at one point ("I'm sleeping fine tonight.") Thanks to Merry, Younger, kel and Katie and Missy for the incredibly helpful betas. Apologies to a completely different CK & JB. My Ted Berrigan quote was "Forget bring the green boy white ways."

DEPTH

It's hot and so fucking crowded that Lance is convinced that half the sweat beading down his back isn't even his. He can't believe he got talked into making the food run. He hates everyone.

A girl who's so sunburned her face looks radioactive gets in his way. She also has these awful dirty blond dreads. "I'm psychic, and I can see your future." She says it very seriously. Lance wonders if she's going to kill him.

"Forget," she says, pausing. "Bring the green boy white ways." She keeps staring. Her hands are really warm against his arm.

"What does that mean?" Lance tries to back up but there are so many people.

"It means, see, I can see. Give me five dollars."

Lance bites his lip. He reaches into his back pocket with his free hand and pulls out his new waterproof wallet. He hands her five bucks because maybe then she'll go away.

She smiles and tucks the money into her bra. Lance is amazed she's wearing one, but it doesn't look like it fits very well. She says, "You, you're a senior in high school, right?"

Lance blinks. "Yeah. Did you just look at my wallet or --"

"I said I'm psychic. So let me explain, see. Like, you're all green boy. All your relationships, except maybe your family, I think, they're fundamentally shallow. Maybe one that isn't, I get that. But the rest. You're really popular, aren't you?"

Lance nods. "Yeah. I guess."

"You're popular because you're friends with everyone but it's always shallow. No one hates you because there is no you to hate. Nothing but surface."

"That's kind of insulting. I gave you five bucks."

"And you know you're getting value," she says, nearly snarling. "Psychics who lie to make you feel better are just liars. I'm not a liar." She pulls back and smiles. "But you're going to forget this week and it's going to be big and important. Remember that, from this, someone's going to bring you something good and you need to remember not to be like you usually are. Commit and be deep for once." She turns around and disappears into the crowd. Lance blinks and two people bump into him and he remembers, food run. He needs to go to McDonalds. He promised the eight other people he's come with he'll get food, and that's the mission right now.

*

Joey opens the wrapping on his cheeseburger. "So you believed the psychic?"

"I dunno." Lance frowns and rearranges his fries and cheeseburger on the wrapper on the bedspread. "I mean, she knew I was a senior in high school. She was right, man, besides you, I don't really have any deep friendships and I'm pretty popular."

Joey makes a face. He eats half his cheeseburger in three bites. "Well, maybe. But I wouldn't listen to some chick who stops you on the street. Unless she's offering free sex."

Lance grins. "Totally."

Chris comes in the door, trailed by JC, Brian, AJ and Nick. It's a huge crowd, lance thinks, friends from school and work. He figured it would be fun to have so many people it was always a party, so when Chris said he would use his credit cards "and the many advantages of being over twenty-five and gainfully employed" for Spring Break, Lance invited his best friends. It feels crowded in a good way, and Lance wonders if that means he is really shallow. He prefers crowds, that's maybe a bad thing.

AJ says, "Dude, why didn't you tell us the food came?"

"I did. I knocked on your door and said, 'shitheads, food is here.' Not my fault."

All five of them descend on the bags and starting grabbing their stuff and then Britney and Justin come in. Joey nudges Lance and angles his shoulder to point at Justin. "Now there's something to commit to," he whispers. His breath smells like pickles.

"Dude." Lance rolls his eyes. He whispers back, "I'm over it. Over, over. Remember New Year's?"

Joey grins. He smirks and whispers, "New Year's when you and Nick were making out in my sister's room for two hours?"

"Right. That was me getting over this year's stupid crush on some guy I'll never get. Like, it's stupid. He had a girlfriend, who is actually my coworker and dear friend. And I know you say he plays for both teams but I was being silly and now I'm so not. End of story."

Brit throws a fry at them. "Guys! Have your private conversations in the bathroom like everyone else!" She laughs and Lance watches Justin stare at her shoes. Justin's so not over her, Lance thinks.

*

Justin squints at the crowds of people and says, "Dude, maybe this was a bad idea."

"No, stop." Chris pokes his arm. "Dude, three weeks of you of whining about how you can't decide whether or not to come. You going on and on and Britney's coming and all these people you don't know and blah blah blah. Fuck, all these dips I totally don't know that Lance invited so we can have two rooms, and you and JC, Lance and Brian and Brit are the ones I actually know. So you had to come."

JC brushes against Justin's arm. "Exactly. And now you're here and you should have fun."

"It's spring break!" Chris jabs Justin's arm this time. "Go crazy."

"That's what the psychic said."

JC walks ahead and then waits, brushing up next to Chris this time. "Okay, didn't Lance run into a psychic, too? Are you guys, like, the same person?" JC laughs like a loon and Justin looks at his feet.

Chris holds onto JC's arm and spins him around. "JC, dude, how much pot did you smoke with AJ? A lot or a lot a lot?"

"A lot. And actually, not a lot. Just a little. AJ's not that great with sharing." JC rests his head on Chris's shoulder. Justin goes back to looking at his feet.

"Lance saw a psychic? Cause, uh, I went to one yesterday. Before we got here, back home." Justin plays with the curls at the back of his neck. They've stopped dead and everyone is just walking by, hitting them as they go.

"What did your psychic say? Lance's stopped him right in the road and demanded five bucks," Chris says.

"Um, it was twenty bucks and it was back home in Orlando. And she said all these things about um, like, I'm in between things and I'm all white where I used to be blue and, um, y'all don't care at all."

JC blinks. "I care." He plays with Chris's hair but Justin knows JC does mean it.

"No, it's fine. I just, you know, she was all saying that I should come here and try to be something different. Like, all my relationships, which, really, just Britney, but you know, I'm always being too deep. And I need to try being more free."

JC has an arm around Chris's waist. He tugs at Chris's belt and Chris slightly shifts away. JC says, "I think that's good."

Chris says, "Okay, so I'm gonna take stoner boy back to the hotel and you can go be free. Get laid right now and don't come back until you've shot your wad." Chris laughs and pulls JC away.

Justin finds a weird coffee shop with big open spaces that isn't too crowded. He gets a latte and sips it in a corner and watches people walking by. A girl with dark hair in t-shirt and shorts sits down next to him. "Hey, sorry, but there's no seats."

"No, not a problem." There really aren't any seats.

"So," she says, "Where do you go to school?"

"I go to high school. Like, um, in Orlando. We drove down here."

"Wow, high school." The girl nods. Justin thinks, be free, don't just get up. Be open. "What year are you?"

"I'm a senior. Sort of. It's weird. I was born in January and I used to live in Tennessee so I skipped a grade back there, and I moved when I was eleven and then I moved again into a different district in the same state, like, just across the city and then this school wouldn't take all my credits and basically, yeah, I have to take four classes this summer, but I'm going to college this fall." Justin tries a big smile. "That was more than you needed to know, right?"

"No, it's cool. And you're here for spring break and you're in high school?"

"Well, it's my spring break, too. And um, my friend? He's like, 25 and it's his friend's college spring break, too." Justin stops before he goes on about how Chris knows some people and Lance knew everyone else. Justin is pretty sure he's talking too much.

"Wow." She touches his hand. "Wanna go walk on the beach?"

Justin presses his lips together and decides to say no. It's spring break, he hears Chris saying. And he thinks about the psychic and trying to be more something. Then he says, "Okay."

*

He still doesn't know her name, but her shorts and her underwear are dangling from her leg and he's up between her legs against the outside wall of the public bathrooms when AJ and Joey walk up. AJ just says "hi" but the girl still gets all pissy and pulls on her clothes, glaring at all of them. She marches off and Justin winces. AJ takes off his shirt and hands it to Justin with a plastic glass of something. "Wipe your face, man, that's sort of gross."

"I think you're the first to get laid of the group of us." Joey crosses his arms and grins. The drink is definitely beer and Justin finishes it off. He hopes he isn't blushing. He can't believe he just did that. And he still feels like an ass.

"You want your shirt back?"

"Wow, no. Pussy juice all over it, I think not." AJ smirks. "Dude, what was her name, she was hot."

Justin know he's blushing. "I have no idea. She never said."

"You dawg!" AJ grins and almost bounces. "Fuck, go you, man. Busting out all over. Was she good?"

"Uh, I don't know. She was kind of skanky, so you know, her turn first."

Joey shakes his head. "That makes no sense. She's kind of skanky so you went down on her?"

"Well, it just seemed nice. Plus, you know, then I don't come off badly, being all about her first."

AJ says, "Dude, you had a girlfriend for way too long. You're a freak." He rubs his stomach and winks at some girls walking by. They ignore him.

Joey says, "Okay, back to the important part. Has anyone seen MTV yet? Like, the cameras?"

"MTV is here in Miami Beach? I thought they were in Jamaica or something." Justin balls up AJ's shirt and holds it tight in one hand. He doesn't really have pockets, but he doesn't want to pitch AJ's shirt. He feels kind of gross holding it, though.

"Yeah, MTV is totally here. And I have one vow this week, ahead of anything, I will get on MTV. Reality programs, stupid contests, there will be me on MTV. It's a vow." Joey grins. He's totally serious, but it's pretty funny, too.

AJ slaps Joey on the back. "Dude, let's go start on that."

*

A drunk girl with long blonde hair leans and shouts at Lance. "So tell me how you know everyone."

The club is pounding loud and they're not even in it. The back of the club spills onto the beach and Lance thinks that must not be legal, but somehow they're getting away with it. Spring Break, he thinks, and grins.

Lance has his drink, and the girl is cute, so he shouts back at her, "Okay, Chris, over there? Is my boss. He's the assistant manager at the movie theater where I work. He's pretty cool. And JC is his friend, and JC is the projectionist at the movie theater. And Brian, the grinny guy? He's JC's roommate. JC and Brian go to GMU, which is, um, a local college. In Orlando. And AJ and Joey and Nick, they all go to my high school. And Joey is my best friend. And Justin is really good friends with Chris and Britney works at the movie theater, too, and she's at my school and she's Justin's ex-girlfriend but they're totally friends."

She nods. "Cool. And here you all are." She smiles again. Lance reaches over and rubs her arm and smiles more. They're both smiling and he leans in and kisses her. And that's going great, kissing and she's standing right between his legs, pushing against him when he opens his eyes and over her shoulder he sees AJ throwing up on the sand. He's been to way too many parties with AJ and all he can think is, at least it's the beach and not someone's living room this time.

"Oh, fuck, um, that's my friend, I gotta --" He points and pulls away. "I'm sorry. I gotta go."

She shrugs and smiles. He squeezes her arm and jogs across the sand. AJ's still throwing up. Lance gets down on his knees next to AJ and rubs his back. "Hey, man."

AJ sits back and wipes his mouth. "Okay, okay," he says. He nods at his head at something and looks shaken. AJ takes off his glasses and rubs them on his shorts. He blinks over and over again.

Lance says, "Did you take anything else? Like, should I be worried here?"

AJ says, "No. No. I'm just. Too much to drink. I should. Where's the hotel, man? I need to sleep. And I think tomorrow, you know, you guys don't let me drink. I think I drank way too much."

"Don't worry." Lance helps AJ up and they stagger across the beach to the main street. AJ can't walk for shit but he really does seem just too drunk and not anything else. Lance remembers when George something or other overdosed at a band party last year and he was much more out of it than AJ is now. They make it back to the hotel and Lance drops AJ into his bed in Chris's room.

"Dude, seriously, you okay?" AJ nods. Lance sighs. "Okay, move over. I'll sleep here tonight, you know, just in case."

AJ says, "You're the best, man. Nick can use your bed or something."

"Totally." Lance goes over to his room and grabs his bag and then puts a note on the door about how he's switching rooms. By the time he gets in the bed, AJ is snoring. Lance is pretty sure that means things are okay.

He wakes up when AJ hits him in the thigh. "Ow."

"I'm awake, man, my head hurts. But that's all that hurts, so yay for throwing up. I just want something for my fucking head."

"I'm not your fucking pharmacy." Lance pulls up the blanket. He glances over and Chris and JC are in their bed and he can see Justin on the cot. Everyone's asleep.

AJ whispers, "I got a good cure for headaches." He leers, and manages not to look silly in the half light somehow. It must be the goatee.

"Dude, you don't need me for that." He thinks about being deep but AJ's been hot since he was fifteen and it's not like he and Lance haven't before. He'll try deep tomorrow. He really will.

"Come on, I know you like it." AJ smiles. He has a sweet smile.

So Lance puts his hands in AJ's boxers and he does like it. He's totally turned on, holding AJ's dick and AJ's being all quiet and biting at Lance's shoulder. It's really hot.

AJ throws his head back and jams his hand in his mouth when he comes so he doesn't make any noise. Then AJ sighs. "Okay, no more headache. You got one?"

Lance covers his mouth and laughs. "Maybe."

*

When Justin walks in the bathroom, Joey is brushing his teeth and Lance is sitting on the toilet. The cover's down, so it's not totally gross. Lance is saying, "So it was fine and stuff, but it wasn't deep. I need to resolve about being deep. And stuff."

Justin says, "Can I just take a whiz? I so have to pee."

Lance gets up quickly, blushing and says, "God, totally. Sorry." He walks out.

Joey spits and says, "Dude, go ahead."

"Um. Okay." Justin lifts the lid and stands with his back to Joey.

"Dude, we've had gym before, I done seen your junk. Oh, and yeah, remember that time we made out last year?" Joey laughs.

"Sorry, I know, but I don't like to pee in front of people." Justin does remember. Last year when Britney decided it was okay if they slept with other people as long as it was people of the same sex. So she fooled around with a lot of girls and Justin fooled around with five guys. Then they weren't sleeping with other people at all but Brit slept with someone else anyway. Justin shakes his head because they're friends now. Really. He sighs and zips up his pants.

Justin turns around and leans against the mirror. "You having fun?"

"Yeah, a little. Got some last night, that was fun. But I didn't find the MTV people. So today, I know where they're filming and shit, and that's where I'm going. Wanna come?"

"I don't think so." No matter how shallow it would probably be.

He finds Britney for breakfast and they eat Egg McMuffins on the beach. She says, "You're still thinking about the psychic, huh?"

"Yeah. Oh, and this morning? AJ and Lance made out."

Britney's eyes light up. "Seriously? Wow, that boy. He's so coming out of his shell, it's so cute."

"Cute?" Justin shrugs.

"Totally. God, when I first met him it was last summer? When I started working at the movie theater. Honestly, I was sure he was totally gay, but he had this girlfriend. And they totally had sex, because she was all convinced she was pregnant for like, one day. We totally locked him in a room with JC one time, as a joke, because me and Chris were convinced he was gay. That was like, before JC and Chris hooked up, obviously." She pats his knee. "Okay, tell me about the psychic."

"I already did." Justin leans against Britney's shoulder. "Anyway, so yes, I think I'm supposed to sleep around a lot on this trip."

"Well, don't let Lance get a lead on you. Go for it." She looks down and flexes her toes.

"I don't wanna."

"The psychic told you to." Britney laughs and pushes him off. "Sorry, I'm sorry. Let's go do something. It'll be fun."

Justin agrees, even though he knows it's a bad idea. Over, they're over. Really and truly. But she was his everything since he was fourteen and he doesn't know what else to do.

*

Lance says, "So, anyway, yeah, I think the AJ thing was a mistake."

Joey nods. "Also, dude, he was really fucked up last night."

Nick comes into the hotel room and sits on the bed. He says, "Are we talking about AJ?"

Joey nods. Nick says, "Yeah, he was really fucked up last night. I saw him this morning and he was all, no more drinking. Ever. He gave all his stash to JC. We'll see how long that lasts."

"Yeah, but if he does, that would be good, then." Lance sighs. "Except, you know, cold turkey won't cure what ails you."

Joey shrugs. "All we can do is be there for him. And with that, let's go to the beach."

The beach is pretty awesome. Lance watches the pretty girls and the hot guys. He wants them all. He pinches himself and remembers he's supposed to be deeper. No more shallow. Joey finds the MTV filming, some game show thing. Nick very much doesn't want to be on TV so he decides to get a coke while Joey waits in some incredibly long line. Lance doesn't really want to be on TV that much and he goes with Nick.

Nick is always a little weird around Lance since New Year's. It wasn't even the first time they made out, just the first time other people knew about it. But Lance walks a safe foot away from Nick and tries to be sensitive. Nick's a good guy, and he's fun and super nice and together except for the not comfortable with being interested in guys thing.

Lance says, "Think you'll meet some nice girls, or is that pointless here?"

Nick smiles. "I dunno. Plus, lots of college guys, man. So, I dunno. Our chances might be crap."

"But, see," Lance says as they get in line for cokes, "I figure there must be other high school girls here, like us, you know? Who are nice. And want some nice guys, not like all these other guys."

"Well, I wouldn't mind being a little bad if it meant, you know, hot girls." Nick grins. He looks really good, his hair almost white from the sun and his skin pink. Lance would totally make out with Nick again if he didn't think it would end up scarring Nick for life or something.

When they get back with the cokes, Joey's moved to near the front of line. Then the producer type says, "Sorry everyone! We're full up. Come back tomorrow with your roommate for a dating game!"

Joey frowns. "I don't have a roommate. I have a smelly brother." He sighs and then grins. "Okay, let's go do something fun. You guys wanna swim and scope out chicks?"

Nick grins and Joey grabs Lance's arm and Nick's arm and pulls them both onto the main street. "Paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarty! It's Spring Break!"

*

Britney sighs and then kisses Justin hard. She tugs down her skirt and pulls on her thong. "Justin, let's go inside and get a drink, okay?"

Justin hugs her and doesn't let go. "Um, so what we just did there?"

"It was great, honey, it's always great, but we broke up. And we're friends now. You broke my heart and I broke yours, I guess, so you know. Justin, let's go inside and you'll find someone and I'll find someone and we'll have breakfast and talk it all over." Britney wriggles out of Justin's arms. "Okay?"

There really isn't any answer to that. And it's not like Justin didn't know already. He just had hope. This is the third time they've done this since they broke up and every time he tried to talk her into getting back together with him. Third time's the charm, except the only charm is that now he knows for sure. So he just needs to get over it. Justin sighs and says, "Okay."

He walks in and takes out his fake ID. He has three beers in ten minutes. He watches Britney do body shots off some hot blonde girl and then some beefcake college guy. Justin thinks he should be shallow. Shallow. Over her. And shallow. It's a stupid mantra.

He goes home without her and decides to walk. A long walk across the beach, moon and stars. Except he walks by three different couples making out and two people puking and some guy arguing on a cell phone. He probably just had sex with the love of his life for the last time ever and it was against a wall outside a club. He's so drunk, it's all surreal. He starts thinking about the part in Catch 22 when Yossarian is in the city and everything is insane and dark. Justin shakes his head. Then he braces himself against a wall.

He finally finds the hotel and makes it to his room. Shallow, he thinks. His life would be better if he were just fucking shallow for once. Not that he isn't sometimes. But he's just gonna get laid. Not just have some goodbye thing with his ex-girlfriend, he's going to have shallow pointless sex. He is.

He goes into the other room.

*

Lance is finally asleep. They'd gone back the same club as the first night and Nick had met this skank ho that no one liked. She was crying, though, and Nick comforted her. And brought her home. Then Lance had to pretend to be asleep as they tried to have sex but Nick was too drunk to get it up. The skank had been nice about it at least.

Lance is dreaming of forests and oranges and then someone is shoving him, waking him up. "Wake up, man, wake up super hot boy."

Lance blinks and stares. There's not much light but he's pretty sure that Justin Timberlake is lying on top of him and trying to kiss him. Lance blinks and wonders how his dream turned into this. He's so over Justin.

Justin pinches Lance's arm and says, "Dude. You're awake and I'm coming on to you."

Lance takes a deep breath. Dream or no, he's not about to say no to this.

Justin licks Lance's neck and murmurs, "Fucking Spring Break, you should have some fun."

Lance puts his arms around Justin and pushes his hips up. "I completely agree. People are sleeping, though, remember. Quiet."

Justin laughs against Lance's shoulder. "Okay." So they're quiet under the covers. But it's incredibly hot and better than AJ. Lance feels bad about making comparisons, but Justin gives him a blowjob and fingers him and AJ didn't do that. So Lance reciprocates and god, Justin's hot naked even if Lance can only really tell by feeling under the covers. Also, he thinks, Justin is a very considerate lover. He laughs as he thinks it.

Lance pulls Justin close and tugs at the covers. "Okay, now we sleep, too."

Justin says, "You're nice." Justin flops all over Lance and Lance decides he likes it.

*

Justin wakes up with a headache. It's not too bad, though, so he just squeezes his eyes shut and breathes in sweaty Lance. It's not a bad smell at all. Being shallow and sleeping with the nearest hot thing isn't working out so bad right now. He thinks about Britney and winces. So he thinks about the bed and right here and now.

Then he hears some chick saying, "Oh, Nick, are you up?"

Nick says, "Yeah, yeah, and this is so on, baby."

Justin shudders. Lance whispers, "Oh, god, are you up?"

Justin whispers back, "Yes, oh, god, are they gonna have sex?"

"Pretend to be asleep. And like, um, dude, I'm not out at school and I think that chick goes to --"

"Don't worry." Justin gets it. He completely agrees. He shifts slightly so he's not touching Lance. He tries to find his boxers under the covers but he's not having much luck. He can hear that Nick and the girl are getting it on. Loudly. Which is super rude, really, because for all they know, Lance and Justin are asleep. And someone should be on the cot, too.

The girl's name is Mandy, apparently, because that's what Nick calls out when he comes. Mandy spends five straight minutes moaning, "Harder, harder, oh my god, you're so big, harder!" Justin thought people only said that in pornos.

So finally they're done and Lance stops biting Justin's hand to stop from laughing out loud. Then Mandy says, "God, um, is that Lance? Like from your school? I think I met him at some county thing? For student government."

"Yeah, that's Lance." Nick sounds sated. Justin snorts quietly.

"Is he gay? I could have sworn I heard him and that guy making out last night. Like, blowjobs."

Nick says, "No. He's so not gay. He's not even slightly gay. He doesn't do gay things at all." Nick sounds really heated. Justin thinks he has to ask Lance when he made out with Nick.

Nick goes on like that for a few minutes and then they leave for breakfast. Justin sits up and starts laughing. "Oh my god, that was so embarrassing."

Lance rubs his head. His hair is all sticking up and looking funny, it's so fucking endearing Justin looks away. "Yes, god," Lance says.

"So when did you and Nick make out? Cause, wow, he so protests too much."

"New Year's. And a couple of times before that. He really does have a big dick." Lance smirks. "I mean, seriously, Nick's a great guy. He's really nice and he has this huge heart and he's smart and stuff. Not that articulate. But his mom laid some trip on his mind and he's really skittish about how gay he is. But seriously, he's really nice."

Justin gets out of bed and heads into the bathroom. "I believe you."

*

Lance doesn't squeal. Not once. It's not like he didn't spend his entire first semester of his senior year watching Justin, thinking about Justin, driving by Justin's house once a week. It was sick, really. It was Lance's old pattern. Every year since freshman year, a crush on some unattainable guy, dating girls he liked but never wanted to squeal over. He got drunk the day after Christmas at Joey's house and while throwing up in the bathroom he decided to stop it. No more of that. And he resolved and he stopped obsessing about Justin. The last three months, he just thought of Justin as Justin, cute guy, whatever. It'd been hard, but Lance knows his heart. So over Justin.

Well, Justin as obsession. Right now he's brushing his teeth while Justin the person who he totally had sex with last night is showering right behind him. Justin peeks his head out and says, "You wanna get in here? We can both get cleaned up and stuff. Before Nick and that girl come back."

Lance spits out his toothpaste. He takes a deep breath and thinks, suddenly, deep. Be deep here. He says, "Sure." That has to be deep. Morning after bonding.

Justin is fucking hot. Naked and wet and his shoulders. Lance takes a breath and gets under the spray. Justin hands him soap and says, "So. How are you?"

"I'm good." Lance sounds squeaky. He says it again, "Good." Sounds better.

Justin grins. He takes the bar of soap and starts running it over Lance's shoulder. "So, um, you weren't this built when we had gym together freshman year."

Lance feels like he's bubbling over. "Well, neither were you. But, um, yeah, there's this weight training class at this gym that Nick goes to, and he got me in and stuff, as a guest. It's pretty cool."

Now Justin is pressed right against Lance's back, soaping up Lance's stomach, and Lance breathes as best as he can. Justin says, "How long do you think we got?"

Lance licks his lips, tastes water, metal. "I think we have some time."

Justin holds Lance close with one hand and puts the soap on the little holder. Justin takes a little step back and his fingers are suddenly pushing right there. He says, "Um, you wanna?"

Lance really really wants to. He thinks it's very shallow and Brian would kill both of them for not using condoms but damn it, no one's that deep. He says, "Yeah, yeah, please."

*

Justin debates eating breakfast with Lance. It's not very shallow of him. Except he has four classes with Lance for the next two months, so being an asshole for no reason other than some damn psychic isn't exactly smart, either. And now, after being the perfect fun lay, Lance wants to talk. Justin actually really likes talking. Britney would get bored with plans and feelings and just want to party, but Justin likes it. Britney said Justin was half woman and Justin pretty much agrees. So he gives in.

Lance looks really serious, like when he made that presentation on the history of the initiative in Government. He says, "So. You sleep with guys."

Justin says, "So do you."

"Yeah. I just mean, um, I didn't know. Like, would you say you're gay or bi or what?"

"I'm not sure. I mean, I've always been attracted to people, not like, gender and stuff. It's about energy and sparks and excitement. You know? How do you think about it?"

Lance looks down at his Egg McMuffins. He ordered three, he's eaten one. Lance presses his lips together and then says, "I dunno. I used to think it was just a thing. You know? Like, I used to just think, okay, some guys are attractive but I just like girls for sex. I mean, not just for sex. And then when I was fifteen, I made out with my best friend and I really liked it. And I was really confused for a little while and then, um, I guess now, I think I'm pretty bi. That works for me. Bi." Lance nods. He smiles like he just got an A.

"Yeah. But I don't think, you know, Chris had a friend back in high school who was out and I don't think I'm up for that. Fuck, even Chris isn't out at work. You know? Everywhere else, but hell no, don't let the bosses know he's gay and sleeping with the college student projectionist. It's kind of weird because I know all these guys, and these girls, too, who are making out at parties and fooling around but nobody's out. It's kind of sad. Because who are the kids that we're all afraid of?"

Lance nods. "Yeah. It's weird. But I think, um, maybe everyone's afraid of like, their parents? Teachers? And the kids we know might be cool with it, but that's not everyone in the school. Plus, um, I wonder how much is just experimenting and trendy? Maybe. But a lot of them are just genuinely afraid of someone."

"Maybe we're all just cooperating with it, though. Like, everybody's being all old-fashioned. It's like the fifties or something, everybody pretends no one has sex but everyone does and now it's we pretend nobody's gay or bi, but some of us are." Justin grabs his Egg McMuffin and eats it in three bites. He's not being at all shallow. This isn't very Spring Break of him.

"Yeah. I see what you're saying, but. I don't, I don't want to be that kid who comes out and makes everything all public. I'm the class treasurer. I mean, that doesn't mean anything but, yeah, I'm not that person." Lance frowns and finishes his Egg McMuffins.

Justin sighs. "Me either. I still have summer school, man." Justin grins. "Because that's a good reason, right? Face it, we're cowards."

"Maybe. But, I'm not, you know, harassing kids in the hall for being all gay. So we're maybe not heroes, but I don't think we're bad guys."

Justin sips his milk. It's odd tasting, not the organic skim his mom gets at home. And papery, but what else does he expect from McDonalds? He says, "Yeah. Totally." Justin pats the table. "Okay, that was deep. Let's go play in the ocean and see if Brian and JC get on that MTV thing."

Lance smiles. "Absolutely."

*

Lance looks over at JC and Brian signing things. He says to Chris, "JC seems kind of spacey. Like, way more than normal."

"Remember how AJ gave away his stash? JC, Nick and that girl of Nick's smoked all of it this morning. All of it. And AJ gets the prime shit. Man, this should be amusing." Chris's shoulders shake as he almost laughs.

Britney comes running up, holding hands with some girl Lance has never seen before. She squeals and hugs Justin. "Justin, look who I found!"

Justin smiles big and hugs the girl. "Christina, girl, look at you! You're not a bit taller but you sure look hot."

Christina rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "Justin, you are way taller. Is that JC over there?"

Chris looks over and says, "Yeah, he's gonna be on MTV."

Britney bounces. "Dude, that's so awesome!" She grabs Christina's hand and pulls her away to another part of the crowd.

Chris stares at JC laughing and says, "J, you think they're fucking?"

Justin sighs. Lance leans back and lets Justin stand close to him. Justin says, "Dude, they met when they were ten. I mean, that's when we all knew each other. Me and Christina and Brit and JC. Community theater and the commercials and stuff. So, um, maybe they are this week." Justin shrugs and Lance can feel Justin's shoulder against his back. "I dunno, man, whatever. She should do what makes her happy."

"She locked me in a closet once," Lance says.

Chris laughs again. "Dude, that was funny. And JC told me you were a great kisser."

Lance blushes. He feels Justin pinching his side. "All we did is kiss, man, swear. And it was y'all's stupid idea."

Chris shoves Lance back into Justin, still laughing. "Dude, me and Brit thought you were deep in the closet. We wanted you to know yourself. We figured JC would help that along." JC and Chris started secretly going out a month later so Lance figures he was really a crappy kisser next to Chris.

"Yeah, you're fucking saints." Lance shoves Chris back and they don't stop until the people in front of them turn around and frown at them.

The show is stupid. Girls and guys being interviewed by their prospective date's roommate. Then MTV is going to follow the dates with the roommates commenting. It sounds dull to Lance, and it's even worse with all the random noise from the crowd here at the actual taping.

JC comes up and the VJ person says, "So tell us about Brian."

"Brian is the coolest cat you could ever meet. Dude, he likes lots of pop music and Christian music and he sings in the choir. He likes action movies and comedies and stuff. And King of the Hill is his favorite TV show, if that matters. He's the nicest guy. Dude, he seems all uptight and stuff sometimes, but he's, like, a peer sex education guy, he lectures at high schools and things. And he doesn't lecture, he just talks. He's totally cool. He's so cool, he doesn't even mind when my boyfriend spends the night in my room."

Lance snorts. Justin reaches over and squeezes Chris's shoulder. "Man," Justin says, "JC just came out on MTV."

Chris tenses and says, "Well, everybody knows. Like, his family and stuff."

The VJ pushes a little on the boyfriend thing and JC is blushing and babbling. He doesn't take it back but he's not speaking in complete sentences at all. The director calls cut and everyone starts milling around on the stage. Some flunky with a bullhorn announces that in five minutes, they'll start with the picking of the dates.

Chris pushes through the crowd and Lance follows. Justin is right behind Lance, saying "excuse me, excuse me."

JC is talking to some guy with a headset. "No, uh, it's okay. My family is all cool with it. They've met my boyfriend. They love my boyfriend."

Headset guy says, "But you understand, this will be your family, your family out of state, people who your family knows. Kid, I just don't want you not thinking about this. Where you work, your classmates, your professors. They all know you're gay? Because, you know, we don't want to get sued because you're all, oooh, you ruined my life."

JC nods. "It'll be okay. Thank you, man, but it'll be fine."

The headset guy stares for a little bit and Lance thinks he wouldn't want to be in his shoes. Then he says, "Okay, so, hey, any chance of getting your boyfriend on camera? He know Brian?"

JC looks over at Chris and then takes a deep breath. "Yeah, my boyfriend's not here this week. He's not in college, so. I'm going solo, but uh, you know, not seeing other people or anything."

Headset guy nods. Chris says, "Hey, JC, how's it going?"

JC blinks and smiles slowly. "It's totally fine, man. Don't worry."

*

Justin listens to Lance tell the story of JC's MTV moment for the fifth time, this time to AJ and some girl AJ is sitting with, and decides to head out. Lance is being a good guy, because every time he tells the story to anyone except for Britney, he leaves out all the stuff about Chris. Still, Justin should be shallow. No more hanging out with last night's fling, find someone else to hook up with, probably. It's a course of self-improvement, Justin thinks.

He says, "Man, I wanna walk around, play on the beach, 'kay?"

Lance turns and smiles. "Sure." Lance blushes a little and look away, and he says, "I'll see you later?" with this lift in his voice. Justin thinks he isn't going to find someone else to hook up with, not tonight, at least.

Justin says, "Totally." He says it too warmly, but Lance turns back to AJ with a little bounce so it feels good.

He finds Chris sitting on the beach by himself. Justin sits down next to him. "Aren't you gonna watch JC on the show?"

Chris leans back and smiles. "They finished the picking right after you left. Brian and some chick named LeighAnne have their big date tonight, courtesy of MTV."

"Huh. That wasn't an answer."

"JC and Brian are off talking about something very serious and so I am sitting here waiting for JC to find me."

"You worried?"

Chris frowns. It's funny how out of place Chris looks on the beach to Justin. It's not because he's old or his swimsuit, it's because something about Chris looks like he's been working all his life. Chris says, "What's to worry about? I mean, Kevin, Kevin the other assistant manager? He knows. I'm not, I'm ready to tell the big bosses, you know, they're all kinda asses and they're never around and I don't want to risk it. But Kevin, he knows about me and JC. And you know, it's not like I got JC the job, or I --"

"Hey now, let's be honest, man."

"I am being honest." Chris flicks sand on Justin's thigh.

"Yeah, and I'm being honest earnest teenage friend. You gave JC that projectionist job because you knew he'd quit the movie theater if he had to keep working tickets and concession."

"Maybe. It's not like anyone else wanted the job."

"Lance wanted it. Britney told me that."

"Whoa," Chris says. "You my inquisition these days?"

"I'm not, I'm just holding you to a standard. I mean, you did give him that job because, you know, you wanted to jump in his pants. But it's not like you fired the old projectionist so JC would get that job, right?"

Chris laughs. "I fired the old projectionist because he made all the girl employees really uncomfortable. They were always complaining to me. Also, seriously? I didn't want to turn on the news and hear 'Stan etc, whose family was found buried in his backyard also worked at General Cinema.' Guy was an ass. I read the contracts, I can fire him for wearing blue socks."

"So you're basically fine. You haven't done anything. Lance is too young to be doing projectionist stuff, right? And JC's good at it, and blah blah. You're fine." Justin leans against Chris's shoulder. "If anyone even figures you two out."

"Well, everyone will be on his ass about this MTV thing, you know those people."

"Seriously, it's kind of sick how many of them I do know, given that I don't even work there. You talk too much." Justin laughs. "So it's all fine. You worry and worry, I can see it on your pretty face."

"I am not the one in this relationship with a pretty face." Chris kicks his feet up and sends sand flying. He does a little backward roll and then tackles Justin face first into the sand. "But I am the one that will kick your teeny ass."

"Oh, you think so?" They're wrestling in the sand when JC walks up with Brian.

Brian says, "The Russian judge awards you a 6.6 for technique!" Chris looks up laughing.

Justin says, "I'm gonna motor, y'all have fun."

JC waves and Chris calls out, "You have not escaped me asking about your new little toy, Justin Timberlake!" Justin waves bye bye with his middle finger raised.

*

Lance is really happy that Justin shows up at the restaurant. They're all sitting near Brian and LeighAnne so they can point and laugh, but Justin wasn't at the hotel when everyone was planning. Justin comes in and makes Nick move over so he can sit next to Lance and that's even better.

After the drinks and salads come and Joey and Brit have moved seats so they can be in the wide angle shots, Justin whispers to Lance, "Come to the bathroom with me, man, I wanna talk. But don't be all obvious and shit."

Lance nods. He eats half his salad and then says, "I gotta pee." He stands up and heads to the back. Justin walks into the bathroom a minute later.

"Oh, you're such the secret agent man." Justin slaps Lance's ass. Lance can see himself blushing in the mirror. "So," Justin leans against the counter. "So, um. What do you think about LeighAnne?"

"Well, I watched the picking part, she seems nice. Nice enough. I like Brian, man, he's cool. Like, completely not cool at all, but cool in that real sense." Lance washes his hands to distract himself from jumping Justin. "So, um. I was wondering, you and Chris? Like, I know y'all are friends, but I never got that. He's like nine years older than you. And you don't work with him, like me and Brit. How do you even know him?"

"Oh. Yeah. My house? Is right next to the apartment complex where he lives. And Chris has this motorcycle. So when I was thirteen, I was walking through the parking lot and I see him working on it. And I'm all, hey. And he's all who the fuck are you? It was the start of a beautiful friendship." Justin looks down and has this small smile. It's really hot in this sort of straight to the heart way. Lance wants to fuck him through the wall.

"Anyway," Justin says. "So my mom was kinda freaked, you know, her thirteen year old kid hanging out with some twenty three year old. But then she met Chris and there was some beat down involved, I hear, and she decided it was okay. Accident of fate, man. But he's like, my best friend. I mean, you know, he's great."

Lance nods. "Totally. He's my favorite manager. Me and Kevin so don't get along, but when Chris is in charge, I'm okay."

Justin steps closer and puts his arm around Lance's waist. "I was thinking, um, after this, we could go hang out."

Lance looks down at Justin's hand, tucked into the waist of Lance's shorts. "That would be really cool."

Brian is really goofy on the date. Lance tries not to snicker, but Nick and Joey are almost laughing out loud. Brian comes over at the end of the date and calls them all "big losers who don't have a date." Everyone laughs and under the table, Lance squeezes Justin's knee.

They leave the restaurant right after Brian does. Joey and Britney disappear off to some club. They've heard some of the kids that MTV is doing a reality show thing on for spring break are all going to be there. AJ spins in the street and says, "Who wants to come with me for moonlight swimming? Sober only, people!" Nick raises his hand and then hefts AJ over his shoulder. AJ says, "We're off, we're off, people, join us!"

"Where's Chris?" Lance tugs at the sleeve of Justin's t-shirt.

"He's, uh, JC is in some van with MTV monitoring Brian and LeighAnne, and Chris is like, at some coffee shop waiting for him. The big goofballs are text messaging, I hear. I mean JC and Chris. Um, so that's everyone. Except us."

Lance almost starts skipping. He thinks, be deep, and then he thinks about fucking in the shower this morning. "So you wanna go hang out somewhere?"

"Well." Justin smirks. "I think that means no one is in our hotel rooms."

Lance jumps. He jumps three steps and then turns it into a run.

*

If you're not trying to get on MTV, spring break is really boring. There's sitting on the beach, but Justin's finished all the books he brought. And he only brought two that he had to read for school. Swimming he can do for about an hour. The town is a resort town and it's really boring. No one, not even Chris, wants to play golf with him when Justin asks. So Justin spends two days hanging out with Lance.

Lance isn't boring. It's funny, having four classes out of six a day with Lance for almost seven months and Justin didn't really know him before this. They only talked about school and stuff like that before. But spring break and a little sex, and now Lance is a total chatterbox. He talks about the books he has to read for school and movies he loves and how he wants to be an astronaut maybe but he'll figure out for sure in college. Lance talks about his family and guys he's slept with and the scariest two days of his life when his old girlfriend was absolutely convinced she was pregnant. He's cool, calm about things in a way Justin really likes.

Justin talks a lot, too, and completely forgets that he's trying to be shallow. Lance isn't like Chris, Lance doesn't get Justin completely, so it's different talking out things.

Plus, Chris and JC are off doing things and Nick found this girl he hangs out with as much as he can when he's not with AJ who's still doing the cold turkey thing. Brian really likes LeighAnne and it turns out she goes to college only an hour away so they're having fun. Mostly, Justin, thinks, he's not doing anything different with Lance than he would have been doing at home, except here they actually met and hung out.

Justin wakes up in Lance's bed, which is the same as the last three days. Lance pats Justin's thigh and says, "Me shower." He gets up and goes into the bathroom. Justin looks over and sees that Nick's bed is empty and so is Britney's cot. Justin rubs his face and tries to think if he saw Joey or Brit last night. They went to another dumbass club and drank a little and then he and Lance made out on the beach until Lance complained about sand getting on his ass. They came back and showered and made really sure there was no sand anywhere on Lance.

Joey and Brit come running in the door, shrieking and Brit jumps on the bed. "We got on MTV! We got on MTV!"

Lance comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. "Dude, what the fuck? You got on MTV?"

Joey jumps on the bed and hugs Britney while they jump up and down. Joey jumps high and then flops onto the bed. Britney lands next to him and sits up, grinning. Justin can't help smiling back. Joey says, "We got on that reality one. It's like the Real World, only it's just a week and they're doing, um, only a three hour special? We'd totally given up, man, Brit's too young to make the game shows and seriously, we decided that being in a crowd scene didn't cut it. So, we got to this all ages club. Cause whatever, it'll be fun, good dancing. And we run into this girl --"

"She's totally hot." Britney leans forward and her breasts almost come out of her shirt. Justin looks up at the ceiling. "So, she's totally, like, wow, hot isn't covering it. Honestly, I totally had to light a cigarette. And her name is, um, Alecia? Whatever. So we start chatting and me and Joey are both hitting on her and she's like, dude, y'all wanna come back up to my hotel?"

Joey smirks. "So we're like, fine. And then she's all, oh, and I'm rooming with my girlfriend and she's on this MTV thing."

Britney pumps her fist. "Score!"

"So we go back with her, and yeah, there's the cameras. They make us sign releases and then we sit around and smoke and talk with the girls and then, you know, the good stuff."

Lance is sitting next to Justin with his hands over his towel. "So, tell, tell."

Joey says, "Well, you'll see it on TV, I bet. Or some of it. I got some with Alecia and Brit made out with the MTV girl. I think Brit's gonna end up fuzzed out with the only seventeen thing."

Britney shrugs. "It's fine, people will know it's me. But you! Man, you even got interviewed!" She slaps Joey's chest. "It was really fun."

Justin laughs and shakes his head. "You know, y'all sound so shallow and stuff."

"So?" Joey sits up. "Look, it's not like I wouldn't have slept with that girl anyway. And we're not selling crack on the street. These girls agreed to be on TV, they're as much whores as we are. I want to be on MTV, I like to sleep with hot girls, it all works out. I'm sleeping fine tonight." Joey laughs.

Lance says, "Hey, we're allowed some shallow moments."

Britney rolls onto her back, lying over Joey and stretching out her arms. "Dude, it's Justin. He would never ever."

Justin sits up and glares at her. "Brit, come on." They had sex against a wall a few days ago and Justin wants her to shut up right now. He wishes she would just shut up, he just wants to remember all the reasons he likes her. And he really doesn't get where she comes off saying that.

"Come on? You're the one sitting in judgment on me." She doesn't move. "Justin, I'm sorry I like frivolous things and sex and having fun. Thank god we broke up."

Lance looks nervous. "Guys, guys, let's calm down."

Justin takes a deep breath. "I'm perfectly calm. I'm taking a shower."

Lance springs up and holds onto his towel. "Me, too. I stopped mine in the middle."

The bathroom is really warm and the mirror is still a little foggy. Lance likes really hot showers. Justin wonders if there will be any hot water. He just starts the shower and strips and walks in. Lance gets in behind him. "So, um, hi."

Justin sighs. He rubs his hair and looks down at the ten shampoo bottles to find his. "Okay, it's just. When I was a junior, Britney was all, oh, we should be free to experiment. Oh, I love you best, but maybe there are things out there we should try. Oh, we'll be together forever, so we should have some fun, too. So she sleeps with any girl she can get in bed and I'm supposed to sleep with these all guys. But I only did it with, like, five. And then we decided to stop except she really didn't. And she slept with this guy in her dance class and I kinda forgave her except, you know, I really couldn't see forever with her and we broke up and she acts like it's all me being all stupid. I can't let her have fun. I just want her to not sleep with anyone but me. I wanted."

Lance rubs Justin's shoulders. "Well, man. You know? I love Brit, she's my dear dear friend and we've been working together for, like, years, but. She's not the most serious person I ever met. You know? It sucks that what you wanted from her isn't what she wanted from you."

Justin sighs. He closes his eyes and washes the shampoo out of his hair. "I guess you're right. It's just, you know."

Lance doesn't say anything. Justin uses Britney's soap and makes sure to get some pubic hairs on it. It feels good.

*

Joey puts sand down Lance's swimsuit. "You motherfucker!" Lance pushes Joey into the ocean and swims after him. "Dude, you fucker," Lance says, "I'm stripping right now, so feel free to swim around and look at my dick." Lance shakes his ass but Joey keeps treading water.

Joey says, "So you and Justin, huh. How's that going?"

Lance puts his swimsuit back on. "Are you still pissed at him about this morning?"

"No. Whatever, man, it's his not his style, it is mine. Brit's the one who's pissed."

"You sure?"

Joey swims farther out and then comes back in. "Let's hit the beach, man."

Joey lies back on his towel and closes his eyes. Lance says, "Are you ignoring me now?"

"I'm not. I'm just, you know, you be deep with your boyfriend."

Lance sits up. "Are you upset with me?"

"Well." Joey sits up. "A little. Were you planning on spending any time with me or am I just lucky today that Justin went off to find Chris so you had to hang with me?"

"It's not, dude." Lance rubs his thighs. "It's not. I mean, you've been all obsessed with getting on MTV, man. And I, you know, getting to know Justin better. I think, you know, we have potential. It could be deep. That's good, right?"

"I guess. But you had deep with me, we decided that." Joey squints and looks out at the beach.

"Yeah, but I want more than one person, not just you."

Joey grins. "Look, I get it. But it's like, man, I thought we'd be having fun this week. I get it, you got your man and you're all happy and I like that, but you know, it's our senior year and our Spring Break and you're all scoring and fucking and being deep. Me, I'm kind of enjoying the shallow. All the deep stuff can happen later, but this week I just want to party. With you, you know?"

"I'm sorry. We're hanging out now."

"Because Justin wigged out and went to consult with his best friend. And you got stuck with yours." Joey shrugs. "Man, just don't be an ass just because you're finally getting some."

Lance nods. "Okay. Promise. We have all day, man."

"And when we get back to school and stuff?"

Lance nods again. "Of course. Come on, Joey, you're my best friend. Don't worry. You're, you know, you. Different from Justin."

Joey sighs. "Yeah, and I'm being a girl, here. Let's go play mini-golf. AJ found a course, man, it's primo."

Lance stands up and pats his wallet. "Cool. Let's go now."

*

Justin hugs his knees. Chris and JC are still under the covers and Brian is sitting on the cot, reading a book on sports management. Justin says, "I just, you know. Am I making any sense?"

Brian smiles. "Dude, I'm sorry, but no. I don't get what's wrong."

Chris shouts out, "Fuck the psychic! Stop thinking she knows anything."

"But she said, she said I was white and I need to be blue or green or something. She said not to commit and get all serious."

"Now, wait," Brian says. "We're talking about you and Lance, right?" Justin nods. "Okay," Brian continues, "then Chris is right. Does something feel wrong about being with Lance?"

"Not at all. I mean, I really like him. And we talk all the time. But all I've ever done is be all serious and committed in relationships."

JC pushes himself up. "So, what's wrong? Why are you all stressed?"

"Because, you know, my last committed relationship went south and now there's this one and all I ever do is get serious. I think the psychic was right."

Chris says, "The psychic was not right. You're being a wuss. Stop that. Go find him and fuck him senseless."

Brian looks up from his book. "Justin, are you two having sex?"

"Well."

"Are you being safe?"

"Sometimes." Justin shrugs. He knows what's coming next.

"Justin, I'll buy you condoms. I know you know Lance, but if you're making these decisions you need to be careful." Brian grins. "I know, I know, I always say this, but you can take the guy out of the sex education, you know."

Justin smiles. "Yeah, I know. We should be careful. But, um, that part feels right."

Brian looks at Justin. "See, if it feels right, Chris is right. You should do what feels right. Not what some psychic says, but what you want to do. What feels like what you should do, be with him. And don't be all 'oh, no, I don't want to get hurt,' be with him. With all your heart."

JC grins. "My roommate is the goofiest, sweetest roommate ever. Man, LeighAnne is one lucky chick." JC sinks back into the bed and curls around Chris.

"So the main thing here is that I should go be with Lance, huh?"

Chris says, "Yes and now leave so I can sleep."

Justin springs up off the bed. "Fine, fine. Point taken, you losers."

*

Lance comes back from mini-golf with a sunburn and some fries from McDonalds. He flops on his bed and reaches for his bag. He should read that book for English. He reads two pages and starts to fall asleep.

Justin pushes him awake. Lance smiles at Justin's pretty face and says, "Hey, you."

"Hey, you. I was looking for you earlier."

"I went to play mini golf with Joey. He was all, man, don't forget your friends, so I wanted to hang out with him. We had all these plans for this week, you know? But I don't really want to be on MTV and he really wants to sleep with a lot of girls, so we're bonding during the day, I think."

Justin snorts and lies down next to Lance. "Yeah. I didn't mean to take up all your time. But, like, I mostly know Chris and JC and they're kinda busy with each other and I can't hang out with Britney anymore. And you're you. We have all these great talks."

Lance nods. "Thank god for psychics, man."

Justin sputters, "What?"

"When we got here, I ran into this psychic and she was all, be deep, you're too shallow and then you and I hooked up. I mean," Lance flushes. He's saying too much. "It's silly."

"No, it's not. I, uh, I saw a psychic right before we came here. My mom goes to her sometimes. She told me to be more shallow, though." Justin grins. "I'm sucking at it."

"I'm sucking at being deep, I think. I mean, you know, we should probably be talking about our relationship and stuff."

"No, you're doing good." Justin curls closer and Lance rubs Justin's thigh. Justin says, "You're cool."

Lance smiles. "You know, um, I had this total crush on you last semester."

Justin laughs so Lance keeps smiling. "Dude, you did? I couldn't tell."

"I used to drive by your house --"

"I knew that. Wait, I thought you were on your way to work!" Justin nudges Lance's stomach.

"Yeah, like on my way to work if I went out of my way by ten blocks." Lance almost giggles. "But dude, in the fall? When you were raking and stuff? In that tight shirt? It was worth leaving early to get to work on time. Sooooooooooooo worth it."

Justin starts playing with Lance's shirt. It tickles. He says, "So wait, you had a crush on me?"

"God, yes. Like, I sent you a carnation. A pink carnation when the band was doing that thing? And you always cheated off me so I knew you'd know my handwriting so I got Joey to write it, and, remember?" Lance is blushing because it was so stupid but he'd had fun with it.

Justin stops moving his hand. He says, "That was you?"

"Yeah, and we were even in government when you got it and I was all, look surprised, look surprised."

"Yeah. That's funny." Justin straightens out and stretches his arms out.

"Um. It doesn't sound like you thought it was funny." Lance sits up and hugs his chest.

"Well." Justin closes his eyes. "See, Brit was convinced I knew who sent me the carnation and we got into the fight about she thought I was cheating and then she confessed she'd been cheating and then we broke up."

"Oh, god." Lance can't even move. "So that was, like, my fault?" He feels awful. Britney never said what they broke up over or how the fight started.

"No, it's Brit's fault and my fault. It's just funny that you started all that without even knowing it or anything." Justin sighs. "Dude, I'm exhausted. Wanna just sleep until later or something?"

Lance nods. He lies back down next to Justin but doesn't move closer. He kind of hopes Justin will come to him, but that doesn't happen.

*

Justin stares out the window. All he can see are more rooms and the pool below. The pool looks really busy. Lance makes a little grunt and Justin gets back in the bed. Lance says, "Justin?"

Justin says, "You remember my name, I'm so touched, man." He leans down and kisses Lance's ear. "Just playing."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Nope." Justin rubs Lance's back. "I was just thinking. But it's okay. I mean, it's not like you knew. And you know, we were gonna have that fight eventually. And, really, the really funny part? I was just asking what you meant about having had a crush, like you don't now?"

Lance smiles. It's pretty, Justin really likes watching Lance smile. Lance says, "Oh, I mean, I used to be all obsessed. I didn't know you, really, I was just obsessed. And stuff. So then I got over it and like, now, you know, I really know you. And I like you, I don't have a crush on you." Lance rolls over and pulls Justin on top of him. "So, um, let's have sex and skip dinner?"

Justin completely agrees.

*

Chris stomps around the room. "Seriously, where is Nick? We're leaving in thirty minutes and I'm not leaving him here."

AJ rolls his eyes. "Dude, stop with the drama queen thing. He'll be here."

"He's already late."

AJ looks up at the ceiling, all pissy. Lance thinks Chris isn't the one being a drama queen. AJ says, "Yesterday, we went to the mini golf place. We started talking to these guys who were playing there and Nick made a lunch date. He'll be here."

Brian grins. "Nick made a date? That's so cool." Lance smirks. Nick made a date with a guy? He's surprised Nick even stood next to one, but maybe Nick's had a good Spring Break, too.

"It wasn't a date date, I think." AJ rubs his chin. "It was just, like, hey, you're cool, let's go play again tomorrow and then get nachos and I couldn't because I actually met this hot girl when I went to the like, Christian no drinking coffee house place and did I mention this girl lives all of forty-five minutes away? And so --"

"We get it, AJ." Joey bounces on the bed. "We get it. We are now clear. Chris, let's just start without him, kay?"

Chris ruffles his hair. JC stands up and says, "Chris is too busy worrying. Here's the deal. We'll check out and if they don't ding Chris for any damage, everybody gets half their deposit back next week. Everybody make sure they checked for all their stuff and didn't leave anything --"

"I'm leaving my soap because someone got their gross hair all over it." Britney sticks her tongue out at Justin. Lance tries not to laugh and Justin just snickers.

"Great." JC snorts. "Anyway, we came down in two cars, so --"

Brian raises his hand. "Actually, LeighAnne said she'd be happy to give me a ride back and I'd really like to. Give us more time to talk and she's so awesome, I really want to."

Chris says, "Fine. Okay, so our car is me, JC and Justin. And Joey's car is Joey, Lance, Britney, Nick if he ever comes back and doesn't run off with nachos guy, and AJ."

Joey shrugs. "You know, we've got five and that's awfully tight. If Lance wants to ride with you guys, it's totally fine with me."

Lance says, "You sure?"

"Yes, I am, go, you take up too much space." Joey throws a wadded up piece of paper at Lance.

JC bends down and throws the paper away. "So that's set. We just need Nick."

Nick comes running in. "I know I'm late, I know I'm late, it's okay, I'm here, I'm sorry I'm late."

"Thank god, let's go." Chris grabs his bag and JC's arm and they leave the room.

Lance sits down next to Justin, their thighs touching while Nick goes on about this totally cool guy he met and how they had the best time and how he's totally going to look up Howie when they get back. AJ interrupts a few times and it's very funny. Nick has a total crush on this guy, Lance is sure. Nick doesn't say it, but it's so obvious. Quite a Spring Break all around.

Then they get in their cars and Lance and Justin sit in the back seat. JC says, "You two can make out if you want, we won't mind."

"Kinky!" Chris grins and accelerates onto the highway. "Seriously, it would be fun to watch, totally fun."

"We're so not doing it then." Lance grins. He closes his eyes and leans over. "I'm gonna sleep on his shoulder. You get your rocks off that way."

JC or Chris turns on the radio and Justin puts his arm around Lance. It's all very nice. Justin whispers, "So, um, maybe a discreet hand job later? It's a long drive."

"No way. Not with those pervs up front. Plus, eewwww, he's your best friend but Chris is my boss."

"You made out with his boyfriend, like, two weeks before they started going out. Maybe JC's told him all about how you kiss and what your dick looks like --"

"Shut up. I'll tell him all about how you are in bed, man."

Justin laughs. "Yeah, you go ahead and brag away. You said I was fucking fantastic."

The car is really hot and humid. Chris hates using the air conditioning. Lance thinks about that first day and New Year's and sending stupid carnations and he says, "Thank god for psychics."

"You're my green boy, man."

THE END.

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