NOTES AND DISCLAIMERS: So made up, for entertainment only. Entertaining lies about famous people I don't know from Adam. A sideways inspiration from Cry Me A River, the one by JRT, and Mr. Adams of NRBQ. Free Man In Paris is a song by Joni Mitchell about David Geffen. Middlemarch is by George Eliot. Chris sings "Surprise" by the Sundays. Songs quoted are "Perfect From The Start" by Jeremy Toback, "Near Wild Heaven" by REM, "Get You In" by Better Than Ezra and "Easy People" by the Nields, respectively. Thanks to G, Younger and Katie for their help in the first draft writing. Thanks to Katie, Kel, Younger and Missy for very very helpful betas.



4. PARIS





Haven't I paid my dues by now, don't I get the right to choose?
And I choose you to take up all of my time
I choose you because you're funny and kind
I want easy people from now on
-Nerissa Nields




The morning after the kiss, which was a kiss and sex in Justin's big bed and then showering quickly and then a forty-five minute show and a long session of pictures and shmoozing, Lance says, "I want you."

Justin says, "Ditto. I mean, I have for a while."

Lance smiles and pulls the blankets closer around them. "I, I was so glad you went on that vacation, I just kept thinking about I was going to jump you or something stupid and you're, well, you're you and my client and my boss and all those things and it seemed sort of stupid. Friends, too, you know, and I kept thinking about Chris and not wanting anything to ever end like that again. And I really, I dunno, Ivan was there."

"Heh. I went on vacation thinking I really needed to get over being hot for you. But then I decided that was stupid. Getting over it."

"So we wasted some time, huh?" Lance rubs Justin's jaw.

"Nah. Timing is important, timing matters. This, right now, right time for us."

Lance laughs. "Yeah. Though, really, I probably would'a kissed you day before yesterday or today or sometime really soon. But you looked so cute, singing your little song, legs spread in your jeans."

"Cute?" Justin shifts even closer.

"Maybe cute isn't the right word." Lance says it like he's Eeyore and they're both laughing, even as they start making love again.

Two weeks after the first kiss, Lance waves Justin over to his laptop. He points at the screen and says, "You need to stop doing that."

Justin looks at the picture. He's standing with Beyonce and Lance and looking at Lance. "Heh. I look kinda, um."

"You want to have sex with me, huh? I mean, it's pretty hard to miss." Lance laughs. "I appreciate the sentiment, but too many of those and well, I'm gonna need to consider a whole new venue for promoting you."

"I've never had to, you know. Seriously, I'm not all experienced in being cool and calm with someone I'm with in pictures. Like, when they're right there. You know?"

"Well, figure it out." Lance grabs Justin's hand and says, "We're keeping it on the down low when it comes to big bright public."

Three weeks after the first kiss, they're in New York again and Justin goes to see Chris. Chris has an office, and two assistants running around, calling people. Justin eases into the seat in front of Chris's desk. He grins. "How come you're not stuck out in Bumfuck, Connecticut, where ESPN is?"

"In my contract. I get to work from New York City." Chris turns his laptop around. "Wanna see the first ten minutes?"

"Fuck, yeah." Chris comes around and leans on the back of Justin's chair while they watch. It's really great. Quick but deep. Chris looks good.

Justin points out all the parts he likes and Chris nods and grins. "I'm really enjoying this, man. I mean, you know, there's history stuff, too. So, like, maybe, I can even claim this is educational. Or something. Either way, it's fun as shit."

"Dude, that rocks. And look at you, all happy. And looking fit." Justin leers.

"You know, hot younger boyfriend type, working out, the usual. I've been skating a lot, playing a lot of hockey." Chris settles back into his seat.

"Boyfriend type?" Justin rubs his chin.

"Type. It's not, you know, no notification needed." Chris looks down and starts playing with his pens.

Justin inhales deeply. "Speaking of notification."

Chris raises an eyebrow.

"So me and Lance? We're, like --"

"Going out? Dating? Together?" Chris smiles.

"Yeah. Yes. Did you already know this?" Justin exhales and relaxes back in the chair.

"Fo shizzle, as the kids used to say. Lance told me." Justin snorts. Chris says, "Oooooooh, did he not tell you he told me?"

"Whatever. I just wanted you to know. Because it is, it's not nothing at all. And you're important to me, and you know, so I wanted you to know."

Chris shakes his head. "It's been four years, man. I'm okay with it. You're good people. He's good to you. You know, timing. You two got it. So, there you go."

Justin says, "We're good?"

"We're always good, man." Chris half stands up and slaps Justin's arm. "You and me, you know."

Justin finds Lance in their hotel room, typing on his laptop. "Buying Oklahoma?"

"I don't want the whole state, I just want the cities." Lance grins and keeps typing.

Justin sits next to Lance at the table. "You told Chris. About us."

"I did. Not exactly told. I emailed him, he replied, I replied and then he replied."

"You let him have the last word, you're so mature." Justin leans into Lance's shoulder.

"Well, yes, yes, I am."

"You emailed him why?" Justin watches Lance who is still staring at the screen.

"I, actually I promised I would. When we broke up. We said if we fell in love again, if that happened, we'd let, I'd tell him. He'd tell me." Lance sighs. "Anyway, so, yes, I emailed him two weeks ago."

Justin says, "Man, close your laptop."

Lance closes it and looks at Justin. "Yeah?"

Justin kisses Lance. He says, "I love you, too."

*

So there's promoting and touring and all the same thing he does over and over again. He talks about how much he likes the album and tries not to sound like he doesn't love everything he's done before. He wants to be clear that he's grown, but he doesn't want to disavow everything he's ever done. His mother talks on the phone with Lance sometimes more than him, she asks Lance how Justin is doing and she doesn't mean the album and the work. He looks over his shoulder everywhere except on stage and sees Lance.

Once in a while they wake up in sunlight, wrapped up in the back of bus. Justin traces the light on Lance's hair and ear and cheek and thinks he's just almost perfectly happy. Lance wakes up and Justin says, "You know, it's like that stupid song, this must be growing up except if I'd known growing up was all, was as bright as this, I would done it a lot sooner. This is great. I really like it."

Lance blinks against the sun. "It's definitely bright." He leans in and kisses Justin. "It is nice."

*

Everything goes faster. The overseas tour, the second leg of the US tour. It feels like he blinks and he's been with Lance eight months, but it's so much more than a blink. He goes to a funeral for a guy from Jive he loathes and it's sad, even then, it's sad. And then he sees Joey in another pew.

Three days later he looks at Lance padding around the hotel room in his pajama pants and Justin inhales sharply. Justin says, "You're hot. You're supernova hot."

"Duh." Lance walks into the bathroom and starts brushing his teeth.

"I mean, look at you. You're, like, thirty --"

"Shut up. Stop saying that. I'm twenty-nine and 64 weeks. I'm not thirty."

"You're a really hot thirty. Like all ripped and shit." Justin grins. "Look, when you're done, I have a thing."

Lance walks out with the toothbrush in his mouth. He talks around it. "Tell me now, I don't wanna wait."

"Okay." Lance walks back into the bathroom and leaves the door wide open. Justin says, "So. I ran into Joey at that funeral, I told you that. And we got to talking. You know, he's at loose ends right now. He's thinking about taking some time off. And JC just finished his tour, and we're done in a few weeks and Chris's documentary is done --"

Lance spits and steps out into the room. "What are you saying?"

"And I said, you know, we went on hiatus because no one had time. Now we all have time. And I said that to Joey and he laughed and then he said maybe we should."

Lance makes a sour expression and grabs his glasses from the side table. "Excuse me? Get the band back together, man, let's reunite! Let's do it? Are you two smoking something?"

"And I laughed and then Joey said maybe we should. And I thought about it for a minute and then I said, why not?"

"Can I tell you all those reasons?" Lance sits down next to Justin and pokes his thigh.

"And I said, here's the only reason that matters: do we want to do it? Do we think it would be fun? And everything else is just bullshit." Justin looks over at Lance. "JC agrees with me and Joey. He thinks we should go for it."

"You talked to JC before me?" Lance stands up and paces. "Okay, Justin, I'm your manager, let me just be your manager here for a minute. You shouldn't do this. It's a step back. You just made your best album ever, it's actually getting really respectful reviews, you won a fucking Grammy, for fuck's sake and this one was all you and now you want to go back to your boyband? Be one in five? It's a step back. I just, I'm your manager and I'm telling you this is a bad idea."

"I don't agree with you. And I don't care if you're right. Didn't you say you thought I would make mistakes of ego? This isn't it. I want to do this. We've got, NSYNC is nothing to be ashamed of. It's not a step back."

"I'm not ashamed of NSYNC, but Justin. Boybands really don't get back together successfully." Justin knows this. Backstreet couldn't, didn't even try. But they broke up all the way, NSYNC just went on hiatus.

"Who says?" Justin stands up. "Don't, you know, we're so not New Kids, we're not anyone. Did anyone think the Rolling Stones would still be touring? And it wouldn't suck? Or Aerosmith? We were, we are better than those other teen pop bands, we never broke up and it wouldn't suck because it would be us. All of us."

Lance just looks at him. He looks tired. Justin says, "Okay, you said your piece as my manager. What does Lance think? You know, Lance Bass, the N in NSYNC?"

Lance bites his lip. "I like being in a band. But, you know. There's this band."

"Yeah. That's why we waited to ask you. Because, you know, Chris." Justin rubs Lance's shoulder. "I mean, you know, up to you."

"You two, you three fucking suck." Lance shakes his head. "We're tabling this. I need a day or two to think about it."

Justin knows that isn't a no. He smiles. "Cool. Let's go to bed."

*

Justin goes to visit Chris the next day. He's in New York, and so are JC and Joey so he calls them and they come over to the hotel so he can tell them about it. Lance sits in the corner. "I'm not participating," he says.

Joey grins at him. "No, you're so not. You're deciding." Lance glares at him and then opens his book. War and Peace now, has been for a month.

Justin says, "Okay, Chris is basically okay with it. He says it has to be all five of us, of course."

JC and Joey nod. Justin says, "And he has conditions."

Lance snorts. "Of course he does."

Justin grins. "He says if we're gonna do this, we need to grab it by the balls. Which is a direct quote --"

"Of course it is," Lance says.

"Anyway, he says when we do it, when we tour, we have to do Pop and I Want You Back."

Joey says, "That's not much of a condition."

"With the original choreography."

Lance bursts out laughing and JC and Joey just stare. JC says, "Like, with the flips? And the stupid --"

"All of it. To quote directly again, Chris says, 'No flips, no Chris.'"

Joey says, "Wait, he was the one -- he complained about them. He made us take them out of the tour and we didn't do them and now he wants the flips? What about his knees? His knees, man!"

JC says, "What about my knees? Hello? I just turned thirty-three."

Lance says, "Chris's knees are fine."

"Are they?" Joey turns in his seat. "I know he's been --"

"He decided," Lance says and closes his book. "He decided after that last tour that he didn't want to be forty and hobbling around, some guy who'd had fifteen surgeries and could still barely walk. So he went to all these doctors and trainers and you know, turned it around. His knees weren't permanently fucked up, nothing he couldn't fix."

JC says, "I knew he was on a fitness kick --"

"He wanted to do an Iron Man. Be like one of those sixty year olds who still makes good time. Run a marathon, all that. He said he had time to make it right." Lance glances down. Justin knows all this, he's almost a little pissed. Lance isn't really the Chris expert. Then he thinks it's a little stupid to be thinking of it as a competition. Then he thinks it was almost five years ago and he starts to say something.

Lance says, "He ran a 10k. He did pretty good." Justin closes his mouth. He didn't know that.

JC says, "So I guess his knees are okay. Does anyone care about mine?"

"Well, we should do some choreography. We're not decrepit." Joey nods.

"Chris isn't," Lance says. "Unless he's let himself go in the past few years."

Justin says, "Look at you, already talking like you're going to do it, too."

Lance raises his eyebrows and flips his book. "I didn't -- Justin, you shouldn't do this. You shouldn't."

"Well, I think you're wrong. And you're not gonna change my mind. So, manager boy, you gonna do it? Cause the only way I won't is if you won't. And you don't, I think you shouldn't decide based on what manager Lance wants, but on what Lansten wants."

"Don't call me Lansten." Lance frowns. "That's my condition."

JC springs up and hugs him. Lance pats JC's back. Joey says, "Knew you'd cave."

*

They tell Johnny over a conference call. He starts laughing and then he says, "You guys will probably be even bigger this time." He and Lance work out a meeting of all their managers to go over the basics.

Justin kisses Lance goodbye, and goes to his soundcheck. One week left on the tour. Soundcheck, show, it's a little weird without Lance. Dependency, he thinks. He turns it over in his head while he gets driven back to the hotel. When he gets to his room, Lance is face down on the bed. Justin says, "Baby!"

Lance mutters something. Justin flops down next to him. He pokes Lance. "What'd you say?"

"I said, ugh." Lance rolls over a little and pulls Justin into a fierce kiss. "That was the most satisfying part of my day." Lance grins. "How was the show?"

"Good. Dude, last show's Orlando, we should get all the guys to come. Last song, all of us. We can do I Want You Back, without the fucking choreography." Justin kisses Lance. "You know, I was thinking on the way back -- wait, tell me about the meeting."

"God, tell me what you were thinking first. Tell me your whole life story first."

Justin smiles. "Okay. So I was thinking about, uh, dependency. That was Brit's theory as to why I was initially crushing on you, you know?" Lance nods. "And what we have now, that's fairly dependent. But it's different. All my life, you know, people all around me taking care of me, helping me, and not sheltering me, not like that. I wasn't shielded from the big bad things, but a lot of other things. And I got used to making it through everything by leaning on Trace, and my mom and y'all. And then it was just you. Just you."

Lance says, "You've never really leaned on me, per se."

"Yeah. That's what I was thinking. I don't, I don't think we're dependent on each other. Not like co-dependent, bad and can't live without each other or some sort of addiction. But you're my equal, I don't lean on you. I rely on you, sure, but I'm not, I'm not addicted to you." Justin kisses Lance again. "To go on way too fucking long about this."

Lance says, "No, I get it. That's good."

Justin pokes Lance again. "Okay, tell me about the meeting."

Lance closes his eyes. "Pure hell. So, it's me, Tyrese --"

"His name isn't Tyrese, man!" Justin laughs. JC's upgraded managers with every new release, and every time they've gotten hotter. The latest one looks exactly like Tyrese.

Lance says, "I know, I know, it's Romo. Ro, so it's me, Ro, Joey's mobbed up cousin --"

"He's not mobbed up. He just really liked the Sopranos, Godfather, Scarface. I swear." Justin laughs a little and pushes Lance's hair out of his eyes. "Okay, so you, JC's manager, Joey's manager, Chris's little old battle axe of a manager. I got it. The scene is set."

"So, you understand, me and Ro, we're the ones who've actually worked in the music business. Not Betty, not Mario. So Mario starts talking about making sure Joey gets enough time. Enough solos. And Betty pitches in. Betty wants Chris to be featured. And Ro and I take the time to explain the entire, you know, NSYNC, it's like a barbershop quartet, there's a reason Joey and Chris and I don't solo, and they both just kinda stare."

"Heh. But Ro was helpful?"

"Well, you know. We spent a little time on that. I spent some fair amount of time explaining that no, nobody's name appears on the marquee, it's NSYNC. We put individual names inside the CD. It's not NSYNC featuring Joey Fatone! JC Chasez!"

Justin grins. "So, it was a little draining. You worked it out?"

"Yeah. I promised Betty and Mario that Joey and Chris could have every one of my solos."

"What did Ro say to that?" Justin sputters.

"Ro said that he thought that sounded like a great idea." Lance frowns. "Fucker."

*

For the last show, they're in Orlando. Two days off after that and then it's NSYNC time. Lance keeps calling it "magic time!" He waves his hands around and makes a goofy face. Justin thinks Lance is kind of dreading it. So this last show is a test run of sorts, of the next eighteen months. Of Lance and Chris together in the same room over and over again and JC and Joey and Justin and all that. Justin pushes into his dressing room and sits down, grins at all of them. "Woo!" He says and keeps grinning.

Chris says, "So our exciting reunion has leaked."

"Yeah, it has." Lance rubs his forehead. The dressing room is crowded, it's made for one. Joey is almost sitting in JC's lap. It would be awkward, maybe, even a Chris and Lance thing, except they were never anything more than fuckbuddies. Joey was never that into guys and JC gave them up after getting his heart broken with the boyfriend after Joey. JC was all more bi than Lance and Chris. Lance says, "But that was just yesterday, so. I mean, Jive is very leery of this. They're making nice noises, but they're leery. They think it's gonna tank and everyone's gonna laugh at us."

JC snarls. "Let 'em laugh. It's gonna be great. People have always laughed at us. We outsold 'em and out everything'd them."

Joey hugs JC. "We'll unleash JC on 'em."

"JC isn't going to convince Jive."

Chris shrugs. "We'll convince them. It just leaked. Wait and see what other people say."

Justin nods. "Anyway, I have a show to do. So y'all sit tight and practice or something."

The show is great, just about fantastic. Justin's just on and everything hits right where it should. He loves the songs and he loves his band and he loves everyone. He loves the way the whole audience seems to sing along, even with the album tracks from the latest album. Justin comes back after the first encore and waves to the cameramen. Lance loves live DVDs. He says, "We're taping this part, but just for fun. Y'all are the only ones who get to see it. So I'm gonna do an old song. I'm gonna try."

He sings two lines of I Want You Back and the screams hit him full force. Justin stops singing and they get louder. He grins and wipes his mouth. He turns to the side and takes the mic again. "So, I think I need some help."

He smiles wide and waves at the guys. He says, "Um, I got some help. Like, you know, sometimes, all my favorite people are all in one place. My very favorite people in the whole world." The screams somehow get even louder as the guys come out. They each take a mic from the back up singers and wave to the crowd. Lance hangs a little to the back and Justin winks at him.

They sing the song. It's just that simple. No choreography, but Justin finds his feet just doing it. Almost. He looks over at JC and he's doing the same thing. They both start laughing and Chris whaps Justin on the back of the head. Justin says, "Okay, let's start from the chorus, I suck." He takes out his in-ear monitor, and almost falls back from the screaming. He puts it back in.

*

Justin is in the living room of his Orlando house with his battered Nike shoebox when Lance comes in and sits on the couch. Lance says, "What's in there?"

"This is my hope chest." Justin grins. "No, I just, you know, sometimes I'm writing and I realize it's not a song for me, it's for NSYNC. You know? There's a part for Chris, and you or JC. And I would, you know, put them aside and then in this box. So I have a box. JC has one, too. Not Nike, I think, but he has some sort of box."

"That's cool. Is JC on his way over?"

Justin nods. "And how is your morning going?"

Lance rubs his forehead and says, "Surprisingly good. Jive is suddenly excited about the NSYNC project." Lance smooths his khakis. "Because the news is good, you know? I think we expected jokes and really, it's more like, hey, remember them? The one decent boyband. The one that didn't suck. And you know, pop is on a downturn, people want it back."

Justin hums I Want You Back and then JC comes in with Joey. Chris comes in a few minutes later. They set up a drum set in the living room and bring in two keyboards, Justin's guitar and another guitar for Chris. Lance wanders in and out, sits down on the couch and listens and then gets up, makes a call in the kitchen.

It's the same the next three days. Lance in his khakis and button down shirt only watching them all writing and talking on the phone non-stop. Justin isn't even sure if Lance is dealing with Justin things or NSYNC things.

On the fifth day Lance is standing in the doorway and suddenly he shouts, "No, fuck you and the overpriced horse you rode in on. You're a scum sucking asshole and I bet you fuck goats!" Lance clicks his phone shut.

Chris says, "You really shouldn't talk to Lynn like that." Justin giggles and watches Lance glare. He stops laughing.

Joey says, "Didn't that anger management course teach you anything?"

Lance snorts and walks over to where Joey is, sitting by the drum set. Lance leans against the wall and says, "They taught me not to hit, Joey."

JC says, "Who were you talking to?"

"Someone from the DVD making people."

Chris says, "Well, since Lance is here, I had this thing I was thinking about."

"Kicking me out?" Lance grins, but Justin bites his lip. Tense and uncomfortable, he thinks.

"No, of course not." Chris frowns. "I was thinking, along with our brilliant originals, maybe we could do two or three covers. Not Max Martin, but I mean, songs to show off us. Our vocal arrangements."

Lance narrows his eyes and then smiles. "Yeah. But no hits."

Chris smirks. "Because that smacks of desperation and it's just --"

"Always a bad idea." Lance smirks back. Something they used to say, Justin is sure, the remnants of their language together. It's a good thing, so he just smiles.

Joey says, "Yeah, that would be cool."

JC nods and Justin says, "Sure. Bring some in, I mean, I assume you have some in mind."

Chris springs up and says, "You betcha." He pauses. "We could do, you know, that song Justin was doing on his tour. That Better Than Ezra one, that one with the what I wouldn't do thing."

Justin shakes his head. "No. That's, it's not a group thing." He glances over at Lance and smiles. "It's not. I think, you know, not suited to us together."

Lance almost smiles and looks away. He walks back towards the kitchen and says, "I have to call the goatfucker back."

In bed that night, Justin says, "It kinda feels like you're not participating in the writing process."

"Well, it should. I can't write. That's been settled, hasn't it?" Lance shrugs and turns off the light. "Plus, you know, because the tour is over doesn't mean my work is over. I have Justin Timberlake things to do and NSYNC things to do."

A faint light comes in from the window, security lights on the lawn. Justin can see Lance rub his forehead. Lance says, "I think, I'm gonna say this tomorrow, you and JC have home studios, I think that would work for laying down the first tracks. We can save some money and while I know that's not that important, it gives us more bargaining power with Jive. They can't pull that 'we're paying for it' shit as much. Cause right now, they haven't put a penny down."

Justin says, "Yeah, that's a good idea. JC's is nicer."

"JC's house has Julie, Joey, Kelly, and three little kids running around. More distractions. I vote we split between the two, you know."

Justin rolls over and rubs Lance's stomach. Still flat, like any minute he's going to get the call from NASA. Lance never takes a break from working out. Justin hasn't hit his home gym since the tour ended. Justin says, "I don't think your lack of writing ability has been settled. You're older now, you read all the time, you have, you know, a way with words. Goatfucker is pretty creative. I would have just said motherfucker or something."

Just enough light to see Lance smile and he shifts under Justin's hand. Lance hugs Justin close. "You're sweet. But really, it's the kind of thing you should know by twenty-nine, the things you can actually do. And I can do three things well. So I'll stick to those."

"Three?"

"Well, professionally." Lance slips his hand around Justin's hip, feather light touches on Justin's dick. "Professionally. I'm a good manager, I can make money from real estate and real estate management and I'm okay at being in NSYNC."

"More than okay. But you're better when you're actually there." Then Lance is kissing Justin and they don't talk more.

In the morning Lance is still on the phone. But he's wearing jeans and a t-shirt. When Chris brings in his CD player and a stack of CDs, Lance closes his phone and sits down in the living room. Joey says, "Nice t-shirt."

Lance grins. The front says 'Justin Timberlake Road Crew 2008.' Lance stands up and models the back. It says 'No, We Can't Introduce You To Him, Put Your Shirt Back On.' JC bursts out laughing.

Joey says, "Can I get one of those?"

Justin says, "They wouldn't even let me have one. It was kinda annoying."

"Hey, you're not part of the road crew. And you could have introduced someone to yourself." Lance grins. He points out the silver writing on the sleeve that says '001.' "See, this makes it authentic. They sell, they sold knock-offs on Ebay. But Anthony numbered all of the real ones."

Chris says, "Okay, okay, I've got songs."

Lance leans forward and they all listen. They pick four songs, nothing Justin's heard before but it's interesting, fun. Lance even says a few things. It feels better, more like it should.

*

"I call this band meeting convened." Chris grins. They've been alternating between JC's studio and Justin's studio for two weeks now. It's really the first band meeting of this whole reunion thing. Justin leans against Lance's shoulder and Lance rubs little circles on Justin's arm.

Chris says, "Okay, since Jive is officially funding us now, I think we can expect we're gonna be touring."

"Woohoo!" JC throws his arms up and laughs. "Sorry, I'm used to narrating for a two year old, I'm getting, uh, over-emphatic."

"Is that what Julie calls it?" Joey elbows JC. "Because we call it just plain JC."

Chris says, "Seriously, guys." He glances over at Lance.

Lance says, "Okay, touring."

"We're doing the flips." JC smiles. "I've been working out."

"I think, there's a more important question." Chris tugs at his beard. "The thing is, do we want to have JC and Justin do a little solo turn?"

Lance tenses. Justin says, "I don't know --"

"You should." Lance stops rubbing Justin's arm. He leans forward and looks at Justin. "Ro would say the same thing to JC. It's a really good idea for you to do it."

"Maybe Justin has his own opinion, Lance." Chris frowns.

Joey says, "I don't know about that."

"Justin does have his own opinions. I'm paid to tell him mine and that doesn't go away here." Lance almost bites out each word.

"No, that's --" Joey puts his hand over Lance's. "I meant, I don't know about Justin and JC doing their little solo bit and then what are we three doing? Do I come out and do a dramatic monologue from my last movie?"

"Well, since that one co-starred Rob Schneider and a monkey, I don't know that there were dramatic monologues, per se." Chris grins and Joey sticks out his tongue at him. "I just mean, we should figure this shit out before we start fucking around with choreographers and planning stuff. It's not an unreasonable idea."

Lance says, "It's not. And we should talk about it. What do you think, JC?"

JC looks down at his hands. He says, "I don't know. It's a good idea. I guess. But it's an NSYNC tour, not NSYNC featuring JC and Justin. I think. You know, maybe we should table this until tomorrow?"

Lance says, "We'll vote. Tomorrow. How's that?" Everyone nods. Justin isn't exactly sure what he thinks or wants here but he's grateful he has a little more time to think about it.

They deal with a few other things, plan out the rest of the studio time. Lance doesn't say too much but under the table, his hand is on Justin's knee. They're meeting in Justin's kitchen, so when they're done Justin walks Joey and JC to the door. They're staying at JC's house, both of them and Justin makes a few jokes about kids running amok. Joey loves to talk about the way JJ is a holy terror and all energetic so Justin loves to encourage it.

He walks back to the kitchen and then he hears Chris and Lance hissing at each other and he waits right outside the door. It's not mature, but he couldn't give a fuck. Chris says, "Well, you know, he's twenty-eight, maybe you should let him talk and not just be his brain and his left hand. Do you let him decide what to do with his dick when you two fuck?"

Lance says, "Fuck you. It's my goddamn job to think about his career. It's my pleasure to think about the rest of him. It's a fuckload more rewarding than thinking about you was."

"Yeah, that was five years ago, man. Get over it. I just want you to stop controlling him." Chris sounds a little closer and Justin edges slightly from the door.

"I'm not controlling him. You think I am? Ask him for yourself. Jesus Christ, who has that kind of power over Justin Timberlake?"

"His mom. Trace. You, lately."

Lance slams something on the table. A glass, maybe. Nothing shatters. He says, "That's such fucking bullshit and you know it's bullshit and you're just saying it to be an ass. So, you know, we agreed to work together and we should do that and you should shut up and leave."

"It's not your house."

Lance sighs. "Yeah, it's not. So stay or go, but stop being an asshole."

Justin thinks he should walk in now. Now would be a good point to stop things. But he doesn't. He keeps holding on to the hope that they'll actually stop doing this. And he just feels weird because it feels, almost, like they're fighting over him. Or using him to fight all the same fights they did five years ago. And they keep not talking or barely talking, so maybe an argument is a good thing.

Chris says, "Look, I just think sometimes, you speak for him, you tell him what you think before even he has a chance to think for himself. And he's not the type of person, he's not easily led, of course not, except for a few people where he very much does let himself be led. So, that's all. And it pisses me off, because it's you."

Justin holds his breath. Easily led, his ass. Lance laughs, though, and Justin breathes. Lance says, "Well, I don't like you talking to him much either."

Chris says, "Fuck you," but Justin knows that tone, that easy tone. Justin figures things are mostly fine and he doesn't want to worry about it anymore today. He goes downstairs to the gym, he should probably work out.

Lance comes down to the gym an hour later, in his workout clothes. "Hey, you started without me."

"I haven't worked out with you in a month, man." Justin sits up from the weight bench. "And now, frankly, I'm done."

"You should use a spotter." Lance gets on the treadmill and turns it on.

"We've had that discussion, man, you point me towards actual articles where non-idiots died from tragic lone weight-lifting accidents, I will stop lifting alone." Justin stays sitting on the bench. "Let's talk about this solo thing. So you think I should vote yes."

"God, yes." Lance is warmed up and he starts running. "Dude, it's a great opportunity. All those NSYNC fans that haven't really heard your stuff --"

"Come on, how many of those are there? Seriously."

"Enough. Or ones who've heard your stuff but just need a little push." Lance pauses. "Anyway, it's a good thing, you should vote yes."

"How are you voting?" Justin wipes his brow with his towel.

"Uh. I think. I guess, I don't know. I mean, Joey's right. It kind of screws, it's an NSYNC tour. And me and Chris and Joey are gonna do what? I can't think, it's stupid for you or JC to re-arrange your songs for us, and what? We're your back-up singers? I mean, fuck, that's my job anyway, but at least with NSYNC I'm part of the group. You know? And so, what, we show clips of Joey's latest movie and Chris's documentary or something and then what? Here's the latest sales figures of Justin's album, go, Lance! Or you know, we can put up rental ads or something." Lance stops talking and runs a little faster.

"So, you want me to vote yes but you're gonna vote no." Justin stands up and fills a bottle with water. He brings it over to Lance. "I mean, you are, right?"

Lance shrugs. "I think, you know, I might. I don't know. Probably. I feel sort of conflicted."

"Me, too."

"I used to, you know, when we were hashing things out with Jive and all that shit, I would have these conversations with myself, you know. Your manager on one hand, myself on the other. You know? 'I think Justin needs to have his name up there, highest.'" Lance cocks his head to the side and says, "'But it's a group, it's not just Justin.'"

Justin grins. "Did you, you just, dude, you were talking different for each side. How come my manager doesn't have as much of an accent? And also, you didn't, I mean, you did this out loud?"

"Oh, sure." Lance looks down and flushes even redder. "In the car, you know, not in front of people."

"With different accents?"

Lance nods. "And sometimes, you know, I'd be your boyfriend and that was even more annoying, because you know, sometimes as your boyfriend, I agree with your manager and sometimes I agree with Lance from NSYNC because I like that Lance."

"How does my boyfriend talk?"

Lance grins. He says, "He talks like Eeyore," and he says it just like Eeyore. "Because I do, right?"

Justin leans in and kisses Lance. It's a delicate operation but he makes it work. "You don't really."

They meet again in Justin's kitchen the next day. Chris says, "Voting."

Lance nods. Chris says, "I think we should do this anonymously."

"Oh, please, like we won't recognize each other's handwriting."

Chris says, "Here." He writes out yes and no with little boxes five times, and rips up the sheet. He gives one to each of them. Justin looks down at his and thinks about Lance and Lance and Eeyore voices. Chris says, "Yes means yes to Justin and JC doing their little dance on the stage, no means no to that." Chris pauses. "And Lance can count the votes."

Justin marks his and passes it to Lance. JC hunches over his piece of paper and carefully marks his, then passes it as well. Lance frowns and mixes up the sheets. "Is this sufficiently anonymous for everyone?"

Chris nods. Lance unfolds the first one and says, "No." Second one, "No." Third and fourth one. "No and no." Lance raises an eyebrow. "And finally, No."

Chris grins. "So that's settled. Let's figure out where we do I Want You Back."

*

The studio time goes quickly. Chris says, "It's like falling off a bicycle," and sits back on the studio couch, arm around Justin.

"It so is." Justin grins back.

Justin thought there would be new arguments, he and JC bringing to bear all that studio time logged when they were in charge. But it's the same arguments from the last album they all did together. And Justin knows how to fix those.

So the same, but better. Better because Justin isn't worried. He wants everything right but he knows this won't be the end. The end of anything. It's funny, with all the money Jive is starting to throw at them and the pressure of the hype that's already gearing up. It used to freak Justin out, make him sweat and this time he doesn't feel it at all.

When Justin walks into the back room for a bottle of water and Chris and Lance are clearly snapping at each other, he's surprised. They've been getting along, everything easy. Justin walks to the refrigerator and gets out a bottle. He leans against the cold door and says, "What are y'all arguing about?"

"Life," Chris says. He rolls his eyes and leaves the room.

Lance sits down. "Get me a cup of tea?" He looks up at Justin and smiles, fake. "Please?"

"Oh, sure." Justin warms up some water, pours into a black mug and puts a tea bag in the cup. "Here you go."

Lance stares at the cup while it steeps. "We weren't arguing about anything, we just, you know, periodically remember we don't get along."

That night Justin is just bone-tired. He thinks he can't even make it all the way up the stairs. He just sits on the bottom step and watches Lance buzz around the living room. "Bzzzzzz, bzzzzzzzz," Justin says.

"You can go to bed, I'll be up soon." Lance grins and keeps putting things away. JC came home with them and he kept pulling out CDs to show Lance and Justin. "Man, JC's wired. I thought kids wore you out."

"Apparently Jillian is rejuvenating or something."

"Maybe she does wear JC out, but JC's so energetic to begin with, you know, studio time, it's just not apparent." Lance pushes the last CD back in place. "Okay, I'm done banging around."

"That wasn't banging."

"Well, it was loud, clack clack putting back the CDs." Lance squats down next to Justin.

"When me and Chris were in Scotland, there was this one time and he was so loud and that was banging."

Lance snorts. "Well, yes, any Chris sized noise is louder than I could possibly be."

"Dude, he was so loud and then we were arguing and he threw a shoe at the wall and we were just screaming at each other, it was so fucked up." Justin shakes his head. "God, that fucking argument."

Lance stands up and crosses his arms. He says, "Yeah?"

"Yeah. It was just you suck, you suck, you suck."

Lance is quiet for a little too long. Justin looks up. "What?"

"You two, you and Chris slept together when y'all were in Scotland?" Lance looks blank.

Justin thinks, his mouth feels heavy. He hates being this tired. He starts to say something, frame a sentence but Lance says, "Fuck you." He walks upstairs and comes back down with a bag.

Justin stands up and grabs Lance's arm. "Are you, what the fuck?"

Lance shoves Justin and keeps walking to the door. "I'll be at Joey's. Screw you."

Justin stands in the middle of the room, blinking because he just can't figure out what happened. He's pretty sure he didn't actually do anything wrong but then again, maybe Lance is just fucking insane and way over-reacting. Justin frowns and stamps upstairs. He calls Chris. "Yo, what are you doing?"

"Trying to sleep."

Justin breathes. He's really angry but he thinks now that talking to Chris is a mistake. Lance would be pissed. On the other hand, Lance is insane. Justin says, "So Lance knows."

"How to calculate something? J, work with me, I'm asleep. I'm talking in my sleep. Knows what?"

"About us. You know, Scotland. Our sordid month and a half of golf and sex." Justin bites his lip and looks around the bedroom. Lance just pulled out one of the drawers and emptied it, he didn't even really pack. Nutball. But Justin's nutball. And one with known Chris issues. Justin says, "It's nothing, you go back to sleep."

"Thank god. Talk to you tomorrow."

Justin doesn't get an answer from Lance's cell so he tries Joey's. Joey answers and says, "Yes, he's here."

"He's being nuts."

"Well, that's your side." Joey sighs. "I mean, it'll be fine tomorrow, he's just cooling off."

Justin decides he's still pissed off and he sleeps on Lance's side of the bed.

His alarm goes off two hours before he needs to be at the studio. Justin rubs his eyes. Lance is sitting on the edge of the bed, playing with the fronds of the spider plant Justin's mom gave them when she visited two weeks ago. Lance says, "You slept on my side."

"You pissed me off."

Lance pats the blankets. "Well, in my anger management course, they said it was better to leave and process."

"You told me you didn't learn anything in that course." Justin sits up.

"Technically, I probably did learn something." Lance almost smiles. "Look, I over-reacted."

"Yes. It was, like, six --"

"Six weeks, two years ago. Joey told me." Lance pauses. "It was just, you know, Chris. And I always kind of suspected, but I didn't want to ask. And you know. Chris."

"I know his name." Justin throws off the blankets and doesn't apologize when they hit Lance. "What the fuck? I think it's perfectly obvious why I never told you and for you to be, all, I'm running out, I can't be here, that's bullshit."

"You're right." Lance pushes the blanket off his leg. "Look, I over-reacted, but, you know, this is Chris. Can we acknowledge he's a weird topic here? A sensitive spot?"

"It was two years, five years ago. I mean." Justin pauses. "Okay, I get it. But there is a point when he's just your ex-boyfriend, right?"

Lance cracks his knuckles. "And Brit is just your ex-girlfriend, right? So if I told you me and Brit went out four years ago?"

"Britney would have told me because we weren't going out then and you like girls, but you wouldn't've had sex with Brit because you guys are friends."

"Okay, fine. Look, I was upset. It wasn't that you never told me, it was just, Chris. I like to think of him as my little trauma and mine alone. You know? Also, I think this is valid. I think it's okay that I really would prefer that he die alone and unloved and never get to be with someone as great as you." Lance stands up and smoothes his pants.

"That's twisted and demented." Justin rubs his hair and gets out of the bed.

"But oddly sweet, right?"

Justin shakes his head and goes into the bathroom.

*

Joey pokes Justin's shoulder. "You and Lance make up?"

"Sort of. He's nuts." Justin rolls his shoulders and leans over the console.

"Well, you're no bag of sane yourself." Joey grins and pokes Justin again.

"Am, too." Justin sticks his lower lip out. "Well, fine, he's nutty and I'm nutty. I'm just, you know, he all storms out." Justin waves his hand like someone storming out.

"Well, you know, he didn't want to get into a fight. He hates fighting with you."

Justin frowns. "Okay, this is getting a little too Lifetime movie for me. He fights with me all the time. A lot."

Joey leans in closer. "Not about you guys. He fights with you about work things. Non-relationship things. Here's a guy who's had all of three, maybe four serious relationships in his life. It's like, okay, I know you've seen that Friends episode where Monica and Chandler have their first fight? And Monica's all, well, people get over fights. And Chandler says, 'They do?' It's like that. You've seen that episode three hundred times. Also, for the record, there are some really good Lifetime movies. I was in one, man. Don't diss them."

"Yours was really good." Justin nods his head. "I mean, you were a good father to that troubled teen daughter. I was, actually, you know, I was really glad you weren't the one abusing her and causing her to act out and dress all goth."

"It was a better movie than that. It was, you know, it was a good movie." Joey grins. "I don't know, I don't think I would have done the abuser part. You know? Variety is good and it's just acting, but you know, a little bit of it kinda lingers and I don't want that much, I dunno, child molesters suck."

"Totally." Justin says, "So, wait, you're saying Lance doesn't like to fight with me?"

"He never has, right? Come on. Admit it." Justin shifts away from Joey. He thinks.

"Okay, granted, we have a pretty easygoing relationship. But either way, it's kind of nutty. I'm a little pissed."

Joey says, "That's okay." He slaps Justin's shoulder and gets into the booth.

Justin and Lance eat lunch together in the back room. Justin says, "Joey says you're Chandler."

"Joey said that to me as well. I don't think I'm Chandler." Lance takes a bite of his sandwich and a little cheese dribbles onto his plate. "You're definitely Monica."

"Monica was fat and unpopular in high school. Also, she was really insecure and stuff. That's not me at all."

"But you're really OCD about cleaning things." Lance uses his crust to mop up the cheese. Lance likes cheese. Justin tries not to think it's cute.

"Which doesn't address our issue, Chandler. You freaking out about us fighting? Do we need to duke it out now?"

"No hitting." Lance nods. "Hitting is bad. I took a course."

Justin laughs. "You're so fucking adorable." And it's not quite settled, but something about the way Lance licks his fingers to get the last bit of cheese makes Justin stop worrying.

*

They film two videos back to back. One of the covers gets snagged for a movie Joey's friend is producing. So they do some black and white sit around and goof off thing for that and a much more complicated video for the first single, a Chasez/Timberlake/Fatone extravaganza.

So they do the lengthy hard work one first. MTV isn't back to doing Making The Video but Lance arranges for a film crew to do a behind the scenes thing. "It'll be good, you know, after the tour, a documentary to put with the show."

They start with the choreography. One rehearsal and blocking. Joey makes a mis-step and Lance starts laughing at him. Chris almost trips Lance and JC pushes Chris. Lance plops down on the floor and grins up at Justin. Justin says, "We should, you know --"

Lance nods. "God, yeah. We should, in the video." He looks over his shoulder at Chris. "We should all fall down."

The director says, "Screw up on purpose?"

"Just, you know, do it and burst out laughing at the absurdity of it," Chris says.

JC nods and says, "Totally. That would be awesome."

The director shrugs and says "Okay." He says something about rehearsing and Joey just laughs.

They start filming. Chris looks over at JC and starts making the same earnest face. Justin and Lance crack up at the same time. Joey sees them laughing and just stops. He leans over and holds his stomach, laughing so hard. JC does a few more steps and realizes he's the only one. So he pushes Joey over and jumps on Chris's back. "Who's got great knees?" Chris grips JC's legs and charges Justin. It just gets worse from there. At some point, someone calls out "cut," but Joey's got Justin in a headlock and Chris and JC are holding up Justin's legs while Lance tries to pull down Joey's pants so it's not like they just stop.

Then they actually do the choreography, letter perfect. Justin looks over once and grins at Lance and Lance does a minute eye roll.

Two days later, they're done and they start on the quick one. It's just walking around a house and then sitting around at a table, being friends, laughing. Lance says, "It's a homoerotic thing, have you noticed?"

"Aren't all our videos a tribute to homoeroticism 101?" Justin leans forward and looks at his hair in the mirror. "That's like, NSYNC's trademark."

"I just mean, it's a song about wanting to be with people who are nice and kind and we all sing it to each other." Lance stands behind Justin and plays with his hair, pulling out curls and making Justin's hair stand higher. "Also, stop looking at me like that."

"I try, man. You're the one who brought the cameras." Justin looks at Lance in the mirror and grins.

Lance kisses Justin's hair and sits back down on the couch. "So, I was thinking. Um, about us?"

"Are you dumping me?"

"No." Lance frowns. "Why do you immediately jump there?"

"Worst case scenario. Get the bad shit out the way first." Justin turns from the mirror. "So, us."

"Well, mostly, me. I was just. Chris never wanted me to fix anything. He put up with it at first, but by the end, he didn't even like me organizing his mail. And, you know, I always felt, before I started to work with you, I always thought, Justin, Chris. You know, the same thing. Linked at the hip and everywhere else. So it was, um, it was nice to be just yours or something. It was nice that we were something separate from the group. You and me, I mean. So I always thought you and Chris would eventually, um, it was like." Lance grins. "I'm not making much sense."

"No, I get it. I mean. Okay, you and me were always friends, but I always felt. Before you started managing me? It was like, we were never friends without the group. Like, even when it was just the two of us, they were there. If that makes sense."

Lance gets up again and hugs Justin from behind. "Makes sense. Anyway, I'm nuts, and you're so Monica."

"Am not." Justin sticks out his tongue at Lance in the mirror.

*

They do a lot of interviews. They decide from the beginning to split up for the interviews except in a few cases so it's Justin and Chris in one room and Joey, JC and Lance in the other.

Justin has his list in his head, things he doesn't say. He doesn't say that he and Lance share a room, pretty much always. When they came to New York, the first night in the hotel they all had rooms in a row. Justin just stared and tried to think of the right way to say he always had an adjoining room. Even before he and Lance were fucking. Lance just shrugged. The next day there was a security thing, two girls who snuck up to see JC and they moved to a different hotel. Johnny walked with them upstairs and pointed at the suite. "I thought Justin and Lance could take that one." Lance winked at Justin, behind Johnny's back.

So they always have adjoining rooms and Lance stayed with Justin for all of the recording but that's verboten. Justin doesn't mention Lance's books, or how they work out every day together. Verboten. He also doesn't mention Friends or Eeyore.

A girl reporter, and she is a girl, twenty-two if she's a day and Justin decides that's definitely really young, says to Justin, "Is it different, from Lance being your manager to being your band-mate?" She laughs. "And I asked him, too, so we will compare answers."

Justin smiles. "Well, it's not that different. Lance was always Mr. Schedule and Mr. Business when we were all together last time, so he's still that. And you know, we were never Lance orders, Justin obeys. We're just, we're even better friends."

She nods. She says, "Well, I remember reading back in the day and it seems like you and Chris were always super-tight and Joey and Lance were super-tight and I wondered about how those relationships have shifted since you were last together."

Justin hates the ones who read old issues of Teen People. He hates the ones who read it when they were ten and have been waiting ever since to dig the real dirt. He smiles anyway and says, "Well, those things haven't changed, they've just gotten deeper. We're all really close. Like, Chris is my best friend and Lance --" Justin licks his lips. He's about to say boyfriend. He's never been this close to a fuck-up. He says, "I was about to say manager. Which he is. But he's, like, second best-friend. And Joey and JC, same thing. We're all really close."

Chris says, "We share underwear. Really. That close." Under the table he kicks Justin's ankle.

At night they go out and dance and party. Then Justin ends up in Lance's room or Lance ends up in Justin's room and they have sex. "Making love," Justin says and laughs.

"Good fucking." Lance slaps Justin's ass and gets out of bed.

"I never," Justin rolls onto his back and stares at the ceiling. "I never thought we'd be so easy."

"We're hardly easy." Lance grins and comes back from the bathroom. He throws himself on the bed hard enough that Justin bounces. "I mean, you know, look how long it took us to get together. Look at the happy fun-filled tension fest that is every group meeting."

"It's not that bad." Justin reaches out without looking and pats Lance's thigh. "I mean, you and Chris are getting along pretty good, right?"

"Eh." Lance's thigh tenses. "It's good enough for government work."

"Well, good enough." Justin's tired, he doesn't want to deal with it. "And you and me, we're, like, fantastical."

"Oh, okay, AJ." Lance laughs. He sits up and pulls the blanket over them. "So, Chris and Nick, huh?"

Justin smirks. "Yeah. You know, they've been dating longer than us." Nick visited two days ago, quietly, of course. But Chris was extra-bouncy in the interviews and smiling and happy. "Who knew, man? They're cool."

Lance kisses Justin's cheek. "G'night." He flicks the light off.

*

They take a break from interviews to meet about the tour. Joey says, "Buses."

Lance leans back in his chair. "So, two? Three? Five?"

Chris shakes his head. "Five buses, man, that's what you have on the tour before you break-up."

"So three?" Lance taps his pen.

"Too much rotating. Or somebody's all, eh, I hate the rest of you." Chris smirks. "Come on, you wouldn't make me have a lonely little bus, would you?"

Justin says, "No way. So, two."

Lance nods. "Okay, so, who gets what?"

"Same as last time?" JC spins his pen in little circles.

"No," Justin says. "Me and Lance on the same bus."

Lance looks down and has a little smile. He says, "So, two or three person bus?"

Chris says, "Okay, I'm not on the kiddie bus. Nothing personal, guys, but I'll take moaning sex noises over Jillian and JJ at three am."

Lance coughs. "So." He pauses. "Yeah, I guess that's best. Justin, Chris and me on the three person bus and Joey and JC on the two. Does that work for everyone?"

Everyone nods and they move on to the set list for the shows. It's harder this time, more flexible with alternate songs for different nights, just a few anchors that they know for sure will happen at set points. But they're not doing choreography for half of the songs, so that makes it easier.

*

They start rehearsals five weeks before the first show. Justin's mom is coming down to see the second day of rehearsals, so Justin hopes they can get things worked out today and not suck tomorrow. They have two singles doing well on the charts, award show performances scheduled and interviews still to do but the album's out and selling. It's selling really well. Jive gives them all watches this time, not rings. Justin's more impressed with the reviews. He tries not to crow but half the reviews even say nice things about NSA along with lauding the new album. Nothing to be ashamed of, he remembers saying to JC and Lance. They were good, they are good still.

Lance squints at the mirror and rubs his forehead. Justin says, "You should wear your glasses. You don't want to miss, you know, flipping people."

Lance says, "I can't wear glasses on stage."

Justin shrugs. "I'm gonna. You let me wear glasses for the last album and tour, I like 'em better than contacts."

JC looks up from the floor where he's stretching. "Your glasses will come off while performing. Then someone will step on them. Man, it'll probably be Joey or Chris."

Chris says, "You can wear sports goggles."

"I'm not wearing sports goggles. We can test your falling off hypothesis in rehearsals. I had them tightened." Justin makes it through halfway through Pop before the glasses fall off and then everyone stops and points. It's pathetic. But it feels so much like home, exactly like home, that he just laughs.

Lance flips Chris over and over again. Just right each time. Joey is too forceful the first two times and not forceful enough the next two times so it's five times before he nails it. The choreographer nods, and says, "Maybe with a smile? Lance?"

Lance rolls his eyes and says, "Maybe."

After a blistering morning, Justin lies on the floor on his stomach. He puts his glasses back on. Not even a crack. Lance sits Indian style next to Justin and rubs Justin's back. Lance says, "I know the contacts are annoying ..."

Justin doesn't shrug, he just mutters. Then he says, "Is anyone else in here?"

"Just you and me."

Justin rolls onto his back and rests his hand on Lance's thigh. "You rock, man."

"I do, a little." Lance smirks. Justin pushes himself up and kisses Lance. It's not the best thing to do for his back but kissing Lance is the best part of rehearsal.

Lance is rubbing Justin's waist under his shirt when the door opens. They break apart and Justin sees Chris in the mirror, walking towards them. Chris looks blank. He says, "Camera crews here tomorrow, guys, you might want to chill with this shit."

Lance rolls his eyes and doesn't take his hand away. "Tomorrow we will."

Chris says, "Whatever," and walks past them. Justin looks at the floor.

*

When Justin goes over to Chris's house two days before the tour starts, Nick is sitting on the couch, feet up, no shirt. He looks comfy and at home. Justin flops down next to him and pokes him on the shoulder. "Where's your boyfriend?"

Nick snorts. "He wouldn't call me that, man."

"Well, he's stupid. I call you that. Where is he?"

"Taking a shit." Nick laughs. "Seriously, he is. In the bathroom."

Justin stretches his legs out next to Nick. "I'm gonna wait right here." He nudges Nick again. "Didn't know you were in town."

"Two day stop-over. Seeing that guy I'm dating."

Justin rubs his chin. "You okay with that?"

"Dating Chris? I like it, man, we've had a good year or so."

"Had?"

"Had and will have." Nick smiles. "I mean, Chris is a great guy. I'm very happy."

Justin nods. He doesn't really know Nick well enough to push. They just fucked, they weren't close. They still aren't. He gets up and walks to the back room. Chris is sitting in darkness, clicking on his laptop. "Nick said you were in the bathroom."

Chris looks up. "I was." He looks back down and clicks more. His face is blue, then white and red. "I had an idea while I was in the crapper. For the next part of the documentary. So I was working up some stuff and I'll email it to my guy."

"I came by to talk to you. If you have a minute. But I don't wanna interrupt the creative process."

Chris nods. "Okay, then sit there for five minutes."

Justin sits in the first chair he stumbles over. The light from screen makes Chris looks demonic and young. Like he's twenty-four again. Justin had the biggest crush on Chris when Chris was twenty-four.

After six minutes, Chris looks up. "Talk."

"Are you, seriously, man, are you actually okay on the bus with me and Lance? I don't want you wigging every time we make out."

Chris twists his mouth. "I didn't wig out."

"Well, fine, you didn't. But I sensed the potential for wigging. And you know, bus. Cramped spaces." Justin waves his hand.

"At some point we'll have a threesome?" Chris looks very serious.

Justin laughs. "That is not happening." Justin shakes his head. "I just, you know, you're my best friend, he's my --"

Chris stutters. "My b-b-b-b-manager! Yeah, I got the memo. I got the memo a year ago. You're too good for him."

"I'm not. I'm exactly good enough for him. And so were you, it just didn't work out. He's not a bad guy. And also, it's not like your time with him was, fuck, unrelenting misery." Justin stands up and crosses his arms.

"Well, no, just those last six months. And a few weeks along the way. But I know him pretty well. He's petty and self-centered and insecure and not as smart as he thinks he is."

"Sounds like you in a nutshell." Justin steps forward. "Don't talk about him like that."

"Yeah, it's me in a nutshell, too. I'm not good enough for you, either." Chris shrugs. "I just think you're the bomb diggety. You and Nick, I don't deserve the golden haired lot of you."

"Okay, granted, you're way not good enough for Nick, but, dude. You know what an ass I am. We all suck. We're all bad people and on our off days we snort coke off hooker's asses. But mostly, we're okay people. Don't give me that shit. Stop being an ass." Justin sighs. "Are you just mouthing off or are you really having these insane thoughts?"

"Mouthing off." Chris closes his laptop and the room goes dark. Then Chris turns on the light on his desk. "Mouthing off. Hey, Nick."

Justin turns around and sees Nick in the doorway. Nick says, "I thought you were in the bathroom."

Chris says, "Me and Justin were making out. Hey, can you give us a few more minutes, man? Sorry, I had a burst of inspiration and then J was giving me his two cents."

Nick licks his lips and finally says, "Okay." He closes the door as he leaves.

Chris says, "I'm mouthing off. I'll be fine with sharing a bus with the two of you and all the coke you snort off random hookers' asses." Chris grins. "Man, now I gotta go reassure Nick. You really do suck."

Justin says, "Maybe you should admit you love him."

Chris stops halfway to the door. "You think that would work?"

"If you mean it." Justin stands up, opens the door and pushes Chris out the door. "And you're really smart and you know you mean it."

Chris says, "Do not." Justin waves as he walks out.

*

Justin throws up in the bathroom. Lance rubs his back and says, "Done?"

"Yeah." Lance helps Justin up and pours him a glass of water. "This is a good warm-up for the show."

"It's our first show." Justin spits out the water.

"And you're nervous." Lance sighs. "Man, it'll be fine."

Joey throws up twice. But they stand together before the show and say a prayer. And then JC says, "Oh, fuck, who has a hackey?"

Lance closes his eyes and leans back against the wall. "God. Don't you?"

Justin pulls it out of his pocket. "I do. I kept it after the last one." He grins. It takes ten tries.

They don't use the springs for Pop. They just start in darkness and then all jump. The lights come up as they land. And it's back, just like that, the screaming and the force of it and Justin's never loved anything as much as looking to his left and right and seeing them.

Somehow the screams are louder for I Want You Back than for the opening. Justin momentarily imagines people holding up scores for the flips and then doesn't think. Just do, just do.

After the encore, they run off and Joey starts talking about the messed up intro to No Strings Attached and Chris is already saying he doesn't think the new bridge on the song from the new album is working. Lance grabs Justin's hand for just a breath, squeezes, and lets go. Then they're on the buses and driving.

*

First, Justin and Chris argue about the coffee. Chris doesn't like coffee anymore; he's worried about his caffeine intake. So he doesn't keep it stocked at all even when he takes the last cup because he has coffee once a day. Only once a day, but somehow it's always Justin's expensive blend that he frankly bought just because Lance likes it.

And Chris feels like he can't run like he likes, so he's taken to running around in circles in the front of the bus. Justin thinks it's annoying to do this while people are trying to sleep. Chris thinks people should sleep through it. It feels like old times, except not in a nice way. Justin remembers when he had his own bus and it was just him and then Lance. Some mornings he likes that better. Chris isn't open to compromise on the running, but he does promise to buy a box of coffee.

Second, Justin climbs into his bunk and wakes Lance up. Lance is pissy and complaining about the promoters, Chris's running, JC's insistence on two rehearsals a day and Justin's desire to play video games even at four a.m. Justin rolls over and Lance keeps complaining, but now he adds Justin being a brat to the list.

Justin rolls the other way and tries offering sex to shut Lance up. Lance is still pissy and says he feels weird having sex when Chris is right outside. Justin points out that Lance didn't feel that way last night. So they settle things with sex. Justin wonders if that's an inadequate coping mechanism but Lance points out they weren't having a serious fight.

Third, when Justin wakes up Lance and Chris are sniping at each other. Their usual argument, take three thousand. They're just arguing about nothing at all. Justin puts the pillow over his head and goes back to sleep.

Fourth, the show is something close to perfect, and Lance smiles even while he has his hands between Chris's legs and flips him something close to perfect. During the banter portion of the evening, Chris and Lance start talking about the woman who only recognized Lance from On The Line and Lance turns to Justin and says that it really did happen. Justin laughs. Chris says something about Justin being Lance's puppet and Joey stands behind Justin, moves him like a doll. But everyone laughs, even Lance.

*

Justin wakes up and blinks against the sun. "Whu time is it?"

Lance says, "Ten a.m. You can sleep more." They're sleeping in the back, on the big couches that are like a bed. There's a door and everything and Chris suggested it, so it's their bed now, no more sharing a bunk.

Then Lance says, "Or not." And Chris plops on the bed.

"Put some clothes on, play Halo III with me." Chris grins and bounces on the bed.

Justin shakes his head. "Nuh uh."

Lance says, "Maybe let him sleep."

"Maybe fuck off. I wasn't asking you."

Lance lies down next to Justin. "Maybe you should play with yourself."

"Maybe I will. And I'll make sure it all lands on your laptop."

Justin sits up. "Stop, both of you. You're driving me crazy."

Chris starts humming the song and Lance joins in. They grin at each other. Justin says, "Okay, is this just some act? Do you not get along or what?"

Lance says, "We get along sometimes."

"When we forget the unrelenting misery."

"And focus on our real enemy." Lance smirks. "You."

They both lean over and start tickling him. Justin tries to push them off and not pee in his pants and only accomplishes the second task. Lance sits back and says, "We win. You suck."

Chris says, "And he swallows."

"Which I appreciate." Lance rolls his eyes. "Seriously, you can take a nap. Or go back to sleep."

"Are you two gonna fight while I'm asleep?" Justin yawns. It would be okay if they fought, he thinks. It's up to them. It's not his job to make everything better for them.

Chris nods. "We're gonna fight."

Lance says, "And then we'll play Halo III."

"And I'll win." Chris nudges Lance.

"I wanna play." Justin closes his eyes.

"Well, it'll go like that." Lance says. "We'll be done when you wake up and we'll have a show and more shows. And the album will sell really well, will continue to sell really well."

Chris says, softly, "And you and Lance will be together forever and adopt 2.4 Romanian orphans. I mean, you'll fight and you'll make up and you'll have screaming arguments and shit and then you'll remember how you're all in love. And me and Nick will probably be together for a little longer and adopt 3.4 Romanian orphans just to show you two up."

Lance almost laughs. "And after this album, you'll make another great Justin Timberlake album and JC will make another great JC Chasez album and Chris will make twelve more parts to his hockey documentary and be the next Ken Burns, only cooler."

"And Joey will win an Academy Award." Chris pauses. "And Lance will own most of the mid-west."

Lance says, "And then we'll make another NSYNC album, because we've proved we can, whenever we want. Even when JC has three kids and Joey has five. And Chris will have better knees than you. And we promise to wake you up for it."

Chris sings, 'here where's the story ends.' Justin turns on his side and Lance tucks the blankets around him. He opens his eyes and watches Lance and Chris walk to the front of the bus. So this is the "post-sync" world, Justin thinks. Post sync, NSYNC, pre-sync. He thinks everything will come true, just like they said. And it's just what he wants, so Justin closes his eyes and prays.

THE END.



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