NOTES AND DISCLAIMERS: Completely made up. For entertainment only. Inspired by the Sondheim quote and Bobbie Gentry's Ode To Billie Joe. Thanks immensely to Younger and Kel.

The little ways you try together,
Cry together, lie together

It was sometime in June. Joey couldn't tell which day exactly. Buses, hotels, interviews, soundchecks and a show. They stood around the table with the food backstage and Tim said, "Everything happens on time, right?"

Tim said the same thing every night on tour. He said it when it was just the five of them and he said it when there were parents around, Bobbie and Britney and before, Dani. No more Dani, not nowadays. Joey wanted to find it comforting, the monotony and certainty of it. And now they would eat.

Except, Tim watched them start to find food for a minute and then said, "Brad quit. Just up and left, no notice, no nothing."

Justin said, "Brad the roadie?"

Lance snorted. "I don't think it was Brad the catering guy. The catering guy's named John." Lance looked down and grabbed another sandwich. Lettuce and mustard spilled out of the edges. Lance took a bite, glanced at JC and then shrugged and sat down on the floor. Lance spent a lot of time watching JC and Joey didn't ever say anything about it.

Chris looked at Joey. Joey looked away and stared at Lance's sandwich.

JC said, "He was nice. He just quit?"

Tim grabbed his own sandwich and took a bite. More mustard, yellow on the sides of his mouth. Tim wiped his mouth with a plain white napkin and said, "He just quit. No notice, nothing. Like I said. And yeah, he was nice. I'm sure it's fine."

Chris said, "It's not fine if he just up and left. Did he say anything to anyone last night? Are we sure nothing bad happened?"

Joey thought Chris knew the answer to that. Chris was just talking, too fast, crushing his sandwich in his hand. Joey could imagine the answers to all of Chris's questions but he didn't want to. He'd made up his mind how he and Chris worked. He grabbed a handful of chips and felt the edges against his palm.

"I don't know. I asked some of the guys, they said he seemed about the same. But he packed his bags, he left a forwarding address, so he left, he wasn't kidnapped or something." Tim shrugged.

Joey didn't want the chips but everyone else was eating. Lance was sitting on the floor, barely paying attention, jaw clicking every time he chewed. Justin was leaning against the wall, next to Lance but Joey knew that was just incidental. Justin was watching Chris. Joey knew if he looked around, he'd find JC standing behind him and JC would be staring at Chris as well. He knew where JC was anyway, because when Lance wasn't looking at the floor, he was glancing right over Joey's shoulder.

So maybe everyone knew and it was stupid to pretend otherwise. Joey wondered if this entire conversation was just a show they were all putting on.

Joey turned and looked over his shoulder when JC said, "It's funny, he didn't seem like the type to just leave. Brad, I mean. He's been working for us since, like, our first tour home. And he was always real nice. I'm just surprised."

Lance said, "He fixed my glasses once. That was nice." He went back to eating with his eyes on the floor. So Lance didn't know anything, and Joey felt lonely. He should have told Lance a long time ago. But it was just a fling, supposedly, so what did it matter? It hadn't mattered when Joey slept around and it seemed like it shouldn't have matter when he stopped and Chris didn't.

JC walked up to the table, brushed past Joey. He already smelled sweaty, a tang suddenly. JC said, "Aren't you going to eat, Joey?" Joey grinned and shoved chips in his mouth, chewed with his mouth open. Justin laughed, always lost to an easy joke. Justin didn't know anything either. Justin probably preferred it that way. Six years ago, four months ago, Justin wanted to know everything.

"It's just weird," JC said. "Weird because, you know, we all hung out with him and now he's just left? I just wonder what happened."

Chris flopped onto the floor next to Lance. He poked Lance's foot over and over again until Lance looked up and spat lettuce on him. Chris wiped the lettuce off his chin and flicked his hand until the lettuce landed on Justin's sneaker. Justin frowned and immediately squatted down and started wiping at his shoe with the edge of his t-shirt. "Not my fucking sneaker, asswipe."

"Asswipe, you're so twelve." Chris didn't smile. "Maybe it's not weird at all. Maybe Brad got a new boyfriend, a sugar daddy."

Joey swallowed the chips in his mouth too fast, sharp in his throat, solid going down his chest. He coughed and no one patted his back. Lance looked up at least, Joey saw that through the red in his eye.

Tim shrugged. "Maybe. He said something about meeting someone a few weeks ago. I don't know what happened, though, we didn't talk much."

Justin was still scrubbing at his sneaker. "I didn't know he was gay, really?" His voice was disinterested.

"He so was, Justin." Lance snorted and licked his fingers. His sandwich was gone. Lance stood up. "I think he was seeing some guy, too, I saw him coming down, um, last week? I was going up and he was coming down, in the hotel."

JC said, "So he was seeing some guy from that?"

"Well, his floor was five and when I got off at ten, he was waiting there for an elevator to go down. So. I don't know." Lance patted his jeans and his cheeks were flushed. Maybe he knew something now.

Tim said, "I gotta go." He glanced back at Chris and Joey and walked away.

"So, he was seeing one of us?" Justin sat back on his heels. His sneakers were white all over. "I mean, that's what you're saying, Lance."

"Lots of people staying on the tenth floor, Justin."

"Maybe he was fixing someone's glasses." Chris jumped up and walked over to Joey. He put his hand on Joey's stomach, softly. "You didn't choke or anything, did you?"

Joey shook his head.

"Well, you didn't fall over and start flailing around, so I felt like you were okay." Chris rubbed Joey's stomach and smiled. "You're always okay, right? You're my okay guy now."

Joey nodded.

Three months later, JC is still with Bobbie but everyone knows it won't last. Lance used to care about that, now he just watches Justin and Joey and fucks anyone he can find who can be quiet about coming up to the tenth floor, or whatever floor it is this time. Justin just smiles and smiles and walks quickly, right in front of everyone else. And Joey thinks about Brad sometimes, thinks about the way he would light up when Chris came up to him, the same way Joey would. But Chris still says Joey is always okay, and Joey smiles and smiles and walks at the exact same pace as Chris.

THE END.

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